How Autism Affects the Brain

Table of Contents

Intro

Autism as a Neurodevelopmental Difference

Brain Structure and Connectivity in Autism

Sensory Processing Differences in the Autistic Brain

Emotional Processing and Regulation

Social Communication and the Brain

Executive Function and Autistic Thinking

Stress, Trauma, and the Autistic Nervous System

Autism, Learning, and Memory

What Brain Differences Mean for Support and Inclusion

Why Understanding the Autistic Brain Matters

Conclusion

How Autism Affects the Brain

Many people wonder what makes the autistic brain different. Parents, educators, partners, and autistic individuals themselves often seek to understand the neurological foundations of autism—not to pathologize, but to understand and support better.

It's crucial to start with this: autism is not a disease, a defect, or brain damage. It's a difference in how the brain develops and processes information. Just as left-handedness represents a natural variation in human neurology, so does autism. The autistic brain isn't broken; it's wired differently, with its own strengths, challenges, and ways of experiencing the world.

This post aims to explore autism through a brain-based lens while maintaining respect for the humanity and dignity of autistic people. We'll look at what science tells us about neurological differences, and what those differences mean in everyday life.

Autism as a Neurodevelopmental Difference

Neurodevelopment simply refers to how the brain grows, forms connections, and organizes itself from before birth through early childhood and beyond. During this process, billions of neurons connect and communicate, creating the neural networks that shape how we think, feel, and interact with the world.

Autism begins during this early developmental period. Research shows that autistic brains develop along a different trajectory, with variations in how neurons connect and communicate. These differences aren't deficiencies—they're variations, much like how people naturally differ in height, temperament, or artistic ability.

This understanding has given rise to the concept of neurodiversity: the idea that neurological differences like autism, ADHD, and dyslexia are natural variations in human neurology rather than disorders that need curing. The neurodiversity perspective doesn't deny that autistic people face real challenges, but it reframes autism as a different way of being rather than a diminished one.

Brain Structure and Connectivity in Autism

Differences in Neural Connections

One of the most consistent findings in autism research involves how different brain regions connect and communicate. Studies using brain imaging have revealed two key patterns:

• Stronger local connections: Some areas of the autistic brain show increased connectivity within specific regions, creating dense networks of communication in particular zones.

• Weaker long-range connections: There's often reduced connectivity between distant brain regions that typically coordinate complex, whole-brain activities.

What This Means in Daily Life

These connectivity differences help explain some common autistic experiences:

Deep focus and special interests: The strong local connections may contribute to the intense focus many autistic people bring to their areas of interest. When an autistic person is engaged with something meaningful to them, their brain can create remarkably detailed mental models and retain vast amounts of information.

Difficulty with transitions: Weaker long-range connectivity can make it harder for different brain systems to coordinate rapidly, which explains why switching tasks, handling interruptions, or adapting to sudden changes can be exhausting or distressing. It's not stubbornness or inflexibility, it's the brain needing more time and energy to reorganize itself.

Sensory Processing Differences in the Autistic Brain

How the Brain Processes Sensory Input

The autistic brain often processes sensory information differently from neurotypical brains. Many autistic people experience:

• Heightened sensitivity to sounds, lights, textures, tastes, or smells

• Difficulty filtering out background noise or visual clutter

• Seeking certain sensory inputs (like pressure, movement, or specific textures)

• Under-sensitivity in some sensory areas

Why Sensory Overload Happens

The autistic brain may have difficulty with "sensory gating"—the process of filtering out irrelevant sensory information. While neurotypical brains automatically tune out the hum of fluorescent lights or the tags in clothing, the autistic brain might process all of this information consciously and simultaneously.

Imagine trying to have a conversation while hearing every sound in the room at equal volume, feeling every thread of your clothing, and noticing every flicker of the overhead lights. This isn't hypersensitivity for its own sake—it's the brain taking in more unfiltered information.

Real-World Impact

Sensory differences aren't just preferences; they have significant impacts:

• Physical and mental fatigue from constant sensory input

• Overwhelm leading to shutdowns or meltdowns

• Need for quiet, predictable environments to decompress

• Avoidance of certain places or situations

Understanding these as brain-based differences rather than behavioral problems changes how we respond—with accommodation rather than criticism.

Emotional Processing and Regulation

How Autistic Brains Process Emotions

The autistic brain often experiences and processes emotions differently:

Intense emotional experiences: Many autistic people feel emotions deeply and powerfully. What might be mild annoyance to one person could be overwhelming frustration to an autistic individual—not because they're overreacting, but because their brain processes emotional intensity differently.

Delayed emotional processing: Sometimes autistic people need time to identify what they're feeling. The brain might register "something is wrong" before being able to label the specific emotion. This isn't emotional immaturity; it's a different processing timeline.

Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Shutdown Responses

When overwhelmed, the autistic nervous system can trigger strong stress responses:

• Meltdowns might look like emotional outbursts but are actually nervous system overwhelm

• Shutdowns involve withdrawal, going non-verbal, or seeming disconnected

• Freeze responses can appear as indecision or inability to act

These aren't choices or manipulations—they're involuntary neurological responses to system overload.

Social Communication and the Brain

Different Social Processing Styles

The autistic brain processes social information through different neural pathways:

• Difficulty automatically reading facial expressions, tone of voice, or body language

• Challenges understanding implied meanings or indirect communication

• Strong preference for direct, explicit communication

• Different eye contact patterns (often feeling uncomfortable or overstimulating)

Research suggests that autistic brains may not automatically activate the same social processing regions that neurotypical brains do, or they may process social information more consciously and deliberately rather than intuitively.

Why This Is Often Misunderstood

Here's what's crucial: autistic communication is different, not deficient. Autistic people often communicate clearly, honestly, and directly. They may prefer written communication where there's time to process, or concrete language over social niceties that feel insincere.

Studies have even shown that autistic people communicate effectively with other autistic people—the "communication problem" often lies in the gap between neurotypes, not within autism itself.

Executive Function and Autistic Thinking

Planning, Organization, and Task Initiation

Executive function involves the brain's management systems—planning, organizing, initiating tasks, and switching between activities. Many autistic people experience challenges in these areas because different brain regions must coordinate, which relates back to those long-range connectivity differences.

This might look like:

• Difficulty starting tasks even when motivated

• Challenges breaking large projects into steps

• Trouble switching between activities

• Needing external structure and routines

Strengths in Autistic Cognition

The same neurological differences that create challenges also produce remarkable strengths:

• Pattern recognition: Autistic brains often excel at identifying patterns, systems, and connections others might miss

• Logical thinking: Many autistic people bring rigorous logic and systematic thinking to problem-solving

• Attention to detail: The ability to notice and remember details can be extraordinary

• Creativity and innovation: Different thinking patterns lead to novel solutions and perspectives

These aren't consolation prizes—they're genuine cognitive strengths that have contributed to innovations across every field.

Stress, Trauma, and the Autistic Nervous System

The autistic nervous system often operates with less margin for stress. Because the brain is already working harder to process sensory input, navigate social situations, and manage daily demands, there's less capacity to absorb additional stress before reaching overload.

Masking—the practice of suppressing autistic traits to appear more neurotypical—places enormous strain on the nervous system. It's like running a computer with too many programs open simultaneously; eventually, the system crashes. For autistic people, this often manifests as autistic burnout: a state of physical, emotional, and cognitive exhaustion that can last months or years.

Chronic stress and the need to constantly adapt to a world not designed for autistic brains can have lasting impacts on mental and physical health, making understanding and accommodation not just nice to have, but essential.

To understand the profound emotional impact of navigating the world in an autistic body and mind, read My Life on the Spectrum. Her story illuminates the inner experience of stress, self-discovery, and the journey toward self-acceptance that statistics and brain scans cannot capture.

Autism, Learning, and Memory

Autistic brains often have distinctive learning profiles:

• Different learning styles: Many autistic people are visual learners or need hands-on experience rather than verbal instruction

• Strong memory in areas of interest: The ability to retain detailed information about special interests can be remarkable

• Need for structure and predictability: Clear expectations and routines help the autistic brain allocate resources efficiently

• Challenges with implicit learning: What neurotypical people pick up through observation might need to be taught explicitly

Understanding these learning differences allows for more effective education and skill development that works with autistic neurology rather than against it.

What Brain Differences Mean for Support and Inclusion

Understanding the neurological basis of autism should inform how we support autistic people:

Accommodations aren't special treatment, they're necessary adjustments that account for different neurological needs:

• Sensory-friendly environments with adjustable lighting and quiet spaces

• Flexible communication methods (written options, extra processing time)

• Clear, direct instructions and expectations

• Permission to use coping tools like noise-canceling headphones or fidget items

Strength-based support means building on autistic strengths rather than trying to make autistic people neurotypical. It means asking "How can we make this environment work for your brain?" rather than "How can we fix your behavior?"

Why Understanding the Autistic Brain Matters

When we understand that autism is about brain differences rather than behavioral problems, everything changes:

• Reduced stigma: Knowledge replaces fear and misunderstanding

• Better relationships: Understanding leads to patience, accommodation, and genuine connection

• Improved education and employment: When we design for neurodiversity, everyone benefits

• Autistic self-understanding: For autistic people themselves, understanding their neurology can be profoundly validating

This understanding helps autistic individuals feel seen and valued for who they are, not criticized for who they're not.

For a powerful example of how this understanding transforms lives, read Sonia's My Life on the Spectrum. Her journey from confusion to self-acceptance shows why connecting scientific knowledge with lived experience matters so deeply.

Conclusion

Autism affects how the brain develops, connects, processes information, and responds to the world—but it doesn't affect a person's worth, potential, or humanity. The autistic brain isn't a broken version of a neurotypical brain; it's a different configuration entirely, with its own logic, strengths, and needs.

As we learn more about the neuroscience of autism, our responsibility is to translate that knowledge into compassion, accommodation, and genuine inclusion. We must move beyond simply understanding that autistic brains are different to appreciating how those differences shape lived experience.

Every autistic person deserves to be understood on their own terms, supported in their challenges, and celebrated for their strengths. Science gives us the framework for understanding, but stories give us empathy and connection.

Also, you can read Sonia's book, My Life on the Spectrum. Her honest, heartfelt account will help you understand not just how autism affects the brain, but how it feels to live in an autistic mind and that understanding makes all the difference.

Autism or ADHD? Understanding the Differences and What Matters

Table of Contents

Intro

What Autism Is

What ADHD Is

Why Autism and ADHD Are Often Confused

Key Differences Between Autism and ADHD

Can Someone Have Both Autism and ADHD?

How Diagnosis and Support Differ

Why Understanding the Difference Matters

Supporting Neurodivergent Individuals With Confidence

Conclusion

Autism or ADHD? 

Many parents, adults, and educators find themselves asking the same question at some point. Is this autism or ADHD? Sometimes the question comes after a teacher raises concerns. Other times it comes from personal reflection, especially when someone recognizes patterns in themselves they have carried since childhood.

The confusion is understandable. Autism and ADHD can look similar on the surface. Both affect how people focus, communicate, regulate emotions, and move through the world. But they are not the same thing. Understanding the difference can bring relief, clarity, and a better path forward.

This article is not about labeling people or creating boxes. It is about understanding how neurodevelopmental differences show up, why they are often confused, and how the right information can help people feel supported rather than judged. When we understand these differences, we can move away from frustration and toward meaningful connection.

If this topic resonates with you, Sonia Chand's book on autism offers a clear and compassionate guide to understanding neurodevelopment in real life. Her podcast also explores mental health, parenting, and wellness from many perspectives, making complex topics easier to understand.

What Autism Is

Autism, also called autism spectrum disorder, is a neurodevelopmental condition. This means it affects how the brain develops and processes information from early life.

Autism primarily involves differences in:

• Social communication and interaction

• Sensory processing

• Patterns of behavior, interests, or routines

Autistic people may communicate differently. Some may struggle with eye contact or small talk. Others may communicate very clearly but prefer direct language and honesty. Sensory experiences can be heightened, meaning sounds, lights, textures, or crowds may feel overwhelming. What feels like background noise to one person may feel like painful static to someone who is autistic.

Many autistic people develop deep, passionate interests in specific topics. These interests bring joy, comfort, and a sense of mastery. They are not obsessions that need to be eliminated. They are often strengths that can become careers, hobbies, or lifelong sources of fulfillment.

Routines and predictability often feel essential for autistic people. This is not about being rigid or controlling. It is about creating safety and reducing the mental energy required to navigate an unpredictable world. When routines are disrupted without warning, it can feel destabilizing in ways that are hard to explain to others.

One important thing to understand is that autism is a spectrum. There is no single way autism looks. Some autistic people need a lot of support in daily life. Others live independently, work, build relationships, and may not be diagnosed until adulthood. The idea that autism always looks one particular way has led to countless people being overlooked, misunderstood, or dismissed.

Autism is not caused by parenting style, trauma, or lack of effort. It is part of how a person's brain is wired. It is present from birth, even if it is not identified until later.

For a deeper and more grounded understanding of autism that goes beyond stereotypes, Sonia Chand's book is a helpful place to start. 

What ADHD Is

ADHD, or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, is also a neurodevelopmental condition. It mainly affects attention, impulse control, and activity levels.

ADHD shows up in three main ways:

• Inattentive presentation, where focus and organization are difficult

• Hyperactive impulsive presentation, where movement and impulses are hard to regulate

• Combined presentation, which includes both patterns

People with ADHD may struggle to stay focused on tasks that are not interesting to them, even if they care deeply about doing well. They may forget things, interrupt conversations, or feel restless inside their bodies. Time can feel slippery. What seems like five minutes may actually be an hour, or the other way around.

Executive function, which includes skills like planning, organizing, starting tasks, and managing time, is often affected by ADHD. This does not mean someone is incapable. It means their brain processes these tasks differently, and they may need different strategies or support to succeed.

People with ADHD often experience something called hyperfocus, where they become deeply absorbed in activities they find engaging. During these periods, they may lose track of time entirely and accomplish impressive amounts of work. This intensity of focus can be a strength, especially in creative or problem solving work.

ADHD is not about laziness, intelligence, or willpower. Many people with ADHD are creative, passionate, and highly capable. The challenge lies in regulating attention and energy in environments that are not designed for how their brains work. Schools and workplaces often reward sustained attention on tasks that may not feel inherently rewarding, which can make ADHD particularly challenging in these settings.

Sonia's podcast often explores topics like focus, mental health, and emotional regulation. Listening to these conversations can help normalize experiences that many people quietly struggle with.

Why Autism and ADHD Are Often Confused

Autism and ADHD share some overlapping traits, which is why they are often mistaken for one another.

Some shared experiences include:

• Difficulty with attention or focus

• Sensory sensitivity

• Emotional regulation challenges

• Social difficulties

• Feeling overwhelmed in busy environments

From the outside, these behaviors can look very similar. A child who struggles in school may be labeled disruptive or unfocused. An adult who avoids social situations may be seen as withdrawn or inattentive. Without context, it can be hard to tell what is driving the behavior.

Both conditions can also lead to anxiety, especially when someone feels different from their peers but does not understand why. The internal experience of constantly trying to keep up, fit in, or meet expectations that feel impossible can be exhausting. This exhaustion is real and valid, regardless of the underlying cause.

Another reason for confusion is that many people have both autism and ADHD. This is called co occurrence, and it is more common than many realize. In these cases, traits overlap and interact, making identification more complex. Someone might have sensory sensitivities from autism and impulsivity from ADHD, creating a unique experience that does not fit neatly into one category.

Understanding this overlap helps reduce shame. It reminds us that behavior is communication, not a character flaw. When we stop judging and start listening, we can better understand what someone actually needs.

Key Differences Between Autism and ADHD

While there is overlap, autism and ADHD differ in important ways.

Autism often centers on:

• Differences in social communication

• A strong need for predictability or routines

• Deep, focused interests

• Sensory sensitivities that are consistent over time

ADHD often centers on:

• Difficulty regulating attention

• Impulsivity or restlessness

• Trouble with time management and organization

• Seeking stimulation or novelty

For example, an autistic person may prefer routines because predictability feels calming. A person with ADHD may struggle to maintain routines because their attention shifts quickly and repetition can feel unbearably boring.

Socially, an autistic person may not intuitively understand unspoken social rules. They may need these rules explained directly and clearly. A person with ADHD may understand the rules perfectly well but struggle to follow them consistently due to impulsivity or distraction. They might interrupt not because they do not care, but because the thought feels urgent in the moment.

When it comes to interests, autistic people often develop deep, lasting interests that bring comfort and joy. People with ADHD may jump between interests frequently, diving deeply into something for weeks or months before moving on to something else entirely.

These are general patterns, not rules. Every individual experience is unique. The key is to look at the pattern of behaviors over time and in different contexts, rather than focusing on isolated moments.

Can Someone Have Both Autism and ADHD?

Yes, absolutely.

Many people are both autistic and have ADHD. In fact, research increasingly shows that the two conditions often occur together. Studies suggest that up to half of people with one condition may also have the other. For some people, this dual diagnosis explains why they felt misunderstood for so long. Maybe they related to some descriptions of autism but not others, or they felt like the ADHD diagnosis did not quite capture their full experience.

Having both does not mean someone is more limited. It simply means their brain processes information in more than one neurodivergent way. It can also mean that support needs to be more individualized, taking both sets of traits into account.

Understanding co occurrence can:

• Reduce self blame

• Improve access to appropriate support

• Help people understand their own needs more clearly

• Validate experiences that felt confusing or contradictory

For people who have spent years feeling like they do not quite fit anywhere, discovering that they have both autism and ADHD can be profoundly validating. It explains why some strategies work and others do not, and why their experience feels layered and complex.

Sonia Chand's work consistently emphasizes that diagnosis is not about labeling. It is about understanding and support. Her book and podcast both reflect this balanced, human centered approach.

How Diagnosis and Support Differ

Diagnosis for autism and ADHD usually involves behavioral observations, developmental history, and clinical assessments. There is no single test that gives a yes or no answer. Professionals look at patterns across time and settings, often gathering input from multiple sources.

Accurate identification matters because support strategies differ.

Autism support may focus on:

• Communication tools

• Sensory accommodations

• Predictable environments

• Social understanding without forcing conformity

ADHD support may focus on:

• Executive functioning strategies

• Time management tools

• Medication when appropriate

• Environmental structure and flexibility

The goal is not to change who someone is. The goal is to help them thrive in a world that often does not accommodate neurodivergent brains. This might mean noise canceling headphones, visual schedules, fidget tools, flexible deadlines, or a combination of many different supports.

Support is not one size fits all. What works for one autistic person may not work for another. What helps someone with ADHD today might not help them next year. Flexibility, communication, and respect are essential.

For parents, educators, and adults navigating this process, Sonia's book provides practical guidance that feels realistic rather than overwhelming.

Why Understanding the Difference Matters

When autism and ADHD are misunderstood, people are often blamed for things outside their control. Children may be punished instead of supported. Adults may internalize shame or feel broken.

Understanding the difference helps:

• Reduce stigma

• Improve self understanding

• Strengthen relationships

• Create better learning and work environments

It also helps shift the conversation from what is wrong with you to what do you need to thrive. This shift is powerful. It moves us from a deficit model, where neurodivergent people are seen as problems to fix, to a support model, where differences are acknowledged and accommodated.

When teachers understand the difference, they can create classrooms that work for more students. When employers understand, they can build workplaces that value diverse minds. When families understand, they can connect more deeply and reduce conflict that comes from misunderstanding.

Sonia Chand's podcast plays an important role here. By bringing together voices from mental health, wellness, and lived experience, it helps listeners feel less alone and more informed.

Supporting Neurodivergent Individuals With Confidence

Whether someone is autistic, has ADHD, or both, support should be flexible and respectful.

Support looks like:

• Listening without judgment

• Adapting environments when possible

• Valuing strengths alongside challenges

• Recognizing that needs change over time

It also means believing people when they tell you what they need. Neurodivergent people are the experts on their own experiences. Sometimes support means stepping back and trusting that someone knows themselves better than anyone else could.

Neurodiversity is part of human diversity. When we understand that, we stop trying to fix people and start supporting them. We recognize that different does not mean less than. We create space for people to be themselves without apology.

Sonia's work consistently reflects this mindset. Her book offers a clear and compassionate framework for understanding autism, while her podcast opens up wider conversations around mental health and wellbeing.

Conclusion

Autism and ADHD are different neurodevelopmental conditions, but they often overlap in ways that can be confusing. Understanding both helps replace fear with clarity and judgment with compassion.

The more informed we are, the better we can support children, adults, families, and communities. Understanding is not about labels. It is about connection, dignity, and care. It is about building a world where neurodivergent people can thrive as themselves, not in spite of themselves.

This work matters. Every time we choose understanding over judgment, we create a little more space for people to breathe, to be seen, and to belong.

If you want a clear, human centered guide to autism that cuts through myths and confusion, explore Sonia Chand's book. It is written to support real people in real life.

Are Autism and Schizophrenia Related?

Table of Contents

Intro

What Autism and Schizophrenia Are

Why People Often Think Autism and Schizophrenia Are Related

Key Differences Between Autism and Schizophrenia

Why Accurate Information Matters

How Conversations Like This Should Be Handled

Conclusion

Are Autism and Schizophrenia Related?

Many people wonder whether autism and schizophrenia are related. The question often comes up because both conditions can affect how someone thinks, communicates, or relates to others. For families and caregivers, this can feel confusing and sometimes even worrying, especially when information online is unclear or conflicting.

It is important to talk about this topic with care and accuracy. Autism and schizophrenia are often misunderstood, and mixing the two can lead to fear or incorrect assumptions. This article is here to bring clarity, not confusion.

In the sections that follow, we will explore what autism and schizophrenia are, why people sometimes think they are connected, and what current research actually says. The goal is to help readers understand the similarities without losing sight of the important differences.

What Autism and Schizophrenia Are

When we talk about whether autism and schizophrenia are related, the first step is to understand what each condition actually is. They are very different, both in how they begin and how they affect a person’s life.

Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition. That means it starts early in life and relates to how the brain develops and works. Autism affects how a person interacts with others, communicates, learns, and behaves. Some common features include challenges with social communication and repetitive or restricted patterns of behavior. Autism is called a “spectrum disorder” because people with autism can have a wide range of strengths and challenges that vary from one person to another. Autism is typically identified in early childhood, often before age three, although some people may not receive a formal diagnosis until later in life. Research from major health institutes describes autism in this way to help professionals and families understand the condition clearly.

Schizophrenia is a serious mental health condition that affects how a person thinks, feels, and behaves. People with schizophrenia may experience symptoms such as hallucinations (seeing or hearing things that others do not), delusions (strong beliefs that are not based in reality), disorganized thinking, or difficulty distinguishing what is real from what is not. It often changes how someone perceives the world around them and can make everyday life very hard without support and treatment. Schizophrenia usually begins later than autism, most often in late adolescence or early adulthood, although early warning signs may appear earlier. Leading mental health research organizations describe schizophrenia as a condition involving disruptions in thought processes, perception, emotional responses, and social interactions.

It is important to know that autism and schizophrenia are classified differently. Autism is categorized as a neurodevelopmental condition because it affects early brain development and shows itself in childhood. Schizophrenia is categorized as a mental health condition that generally appears later and involves changes in perception and thought processes. While both conditions involve the brain and may affect social behavior, they are diagnosed at different stages of life and for different reasons.

Understanding these basic definitions helps us see that, although there can be some overlap in behaviors or traits, autism and schizophrenia are not the same condition. They have different causes, different symptoms, and different developmental patterns, and they are treated and supported in different ways.

Why People Often Think Autism and Schizophrenia Are Related

Many people assume autism and schizophrenia are connected because some of the outward behaviors can look similar at first glance. For example, both conditions can involve social withdrawal, difficulty with communication, or challenges in reading social cues. When someone sees these traits without context, it is easy to think they come from the same place, even though they do not.

Another reason for the confusion comes from history. In early psychiatric research, autism and schizophrenia were not clearly separated. Decades ago, autism was sometimes described as a childhood form of schizophrenia. This outdated thinking has stayed in public memory, even though modern research has clearly shown that they are different conditions with different developmental paths. Unfortunately, once an idea enters public discussion, it can take a long time to disappear.

Media and misinformation also play a big role. Movies, headlines, and social media posts sometimes oversimplify or sensationalize mental health topics. Autism and schizophrenia may be grouped together under vague terms like severe mental illness or misunderstood behavior. This blending can create fear and misunderstanding, especially for families who are looking for clear answers.

Because of these factors, it is common for people to connect the two conditions even when science does not support that conclusion. Understanding where this confusion comes from is an important step toward having more accurate and compassionate conversations.

Key Differences Between Autism and Schizophrenia

While autism and schizophrenia can sometimes appear similar on the surface, there are important differences that help doctors and researchers tell them apart. Understanding these differences can reduce confusion and prevent incorrect assumptions.

Age of Onset and Developmental Timeline

One of the biggest differences is when each condition begins.

• Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition, which means signs are usually present early in life.

• Many autistic traits appear in early childhood, often before the age of three.

• Schizophrenia typically develops much later, most often during late adolescence or early adulthood.

This difference in timing is a key reason why the two conditions are diagnosed and treated differently.

Differences in Symptoms

The types of symptoms involved are also very different.

Autism commonly involves:

• Differences in social communication

• Sensory sensitivities, such as being overwhelmed by sounds or textures

• Repetitive behaviors or strong interests

Schizophrenia often involves:

• Hallucinations, such as hearing or seeing things that are not there

• Delusions, which are strong beliefs that do not match reality

• Disorganized thinking or speech

These symptoms affect the brain in different ways and require very different kinds of support.

Stability of Traits Over Time

Another important difference is how symptoms change over time.

• Autistic traits tend to be consistent and stable throughout a person’s life, even though support needs may change.

• Schizophrenia often involves episodes, where symptoms may worsen for a period of time and then improve with treatment.

This difference in stability versus episodic symptoms is another clear reason why autism and schizophrenia are considered separate conditions.

Recognizing these differences helps families, educators, and healthcare providers respond with understanding rather than fear.

Why Accurate Information Matters

When autism and schizophrenia are misunderstood or mixed together, it can create unnecessary fear. Families may worry about outcomes that are not accurate, and individuals may face stigma based on assumptions that do not reflect their reality. Clear and accurate information helps replace fear with understanding.

Accurate knowledge also helps families seek the right kind of support. Autism and schizophrenia require very different approaches to care, education, and treatment. When people understand the differences, they are better equipped to ask the right questions, find appropriate services, and advocate effectively for themselves or their loved ones.

Perhaps most importantly, accurate information helps prevent harmful assumptions and incorrect diagnoses. Mislabeling behaviors can delay support or lead to interventions that are not helpful. When we take the time to understand each condition clearly, we create space for compassion, respect, and better outcomes.

For a deeper and grounded understanding of neurodevelopment, and for practical guidance on how to support autistic individuals with confidence, read Sonia’s book on autism. 

How Conversations Like This Should Be Handled

Conversations about autism and schizophrenia should always be approached with care, respect, and compassion. The words we use matter. When language is thoughtful and accurate, it helps people feel seen rather than labeled. Compassionate communication also reduces fear and creates space for honest questions without judgment.

Lumping different conditions together can be harmful. Autism and schizophrenia are distinct, and treating them as the same can lead to misunderstanding, stigma, and inappropriate support. Each condition deserves to be understood on its own terms, with attention to the unique experiences of the people who live with it.

Education plays a key role in improving public understanding. When people have access to clear, reliable information, they are less likely to rely on stereotypes or misinformation. Education helps families, educators, and communities respond with empathy and confidence rather than fear.

If you want to hear thoughtful conversations that explore mental health, neurodiversity, and wellness from many different perspectives, listen to Sonia’s podcast. Her episodes offer insight, clarity, and real conversations that help make complex topics easier to understand.

Conclusion

Autism and schizophrenia are distinct conditions, even though they may share some overlapping features on the surface. Understanding this difference is important. Similar traits do not mean the conditions are the same, and shared areas of research do not lead to the same life experiences or outcomes.

When conversations around mental health are driven by fear or confusion, they can do more harm than good. Thoughtful and informed discussions help reduce stigma and support individuals and families in meaningful ways. The more we learn, the better we can respond with empathy, accuracy, and care.

If you want to continue learning, listen to Sonia Chand’s podcast for broader conversations on mental health, neurodiversity, and wellness. You can also read her book for a clear, human centered guide to autism that offers understanding, confidence, and practical support for real life situations.

Sources

1. National Institute of Child Health and Human Development. (n.d.). Autism spectrum disorder.
https://www.nichd.nih.gov/health/topics/autism/conditioninfo

2. National Institute of Mental Health. (n.d.). Schizophrenia.
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/schizophrenia

3. Rapoport, J. L., Giedd, J. N., & Gogtay, N. (2021). Neurodevelopmental model of schizophrenia: Update 2012. Molecular Psychiatry, 27, 1040–1053.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34967130/

When Was Autism Discovered?

Table of Contents

Intro

Early Observations of Autistic Traits Before the Term "Autism"

1910–1930s: The First Uses of the Word "Autism"

1940s: Autism Recognized as a Distinct Condition

How the Understanding of Autism Evolved Over the Decades

When Did People Realize That Adults Can Be Autistic?

Myths About Autism's "Discovery"

Why Many Adults Only Recently Learned About Autism

The Role of Autistic Voices in Re-Shaping Autism History

What We Now Know: Autism Has Always Existed

Conclusion

When Was Autism Discovered? (A Gentle Look at the History of Autism)

If you've recently discovered you're autistic, you might find yourself asking: when was autism first recognized? It's a question many late-identified autistic adults ask as they piece together their own stories. Understanding when and how autism was identified can help explain why so many of us spent years feeling different without knowing why.

The history of autism isn't just about dates and names in medical textbooks. It's about understanding how generations of autistic people lived without the language to describe their experiences, how bias shaped early research, and why so many adults are only now discovering their autistic identity.

For those of us navigating this journey of self-discovery, learning this history can be validating, frustrating, and ultimately empowering. It helps us see that our neurotype has always existed—it just took the world a long time to understand it properly.

Early Observations of Autistic Traits Before the Term "Autism"

Autism existed long before anyone gave it a name. Throughout history, there are accounts of individuals who likely were autistic—people described as eccentric, withdrawn, unusually focused on specific interests, or communicating differently from their peers. These descriptions appear in medical texts, personal letters, and historical records spanning centuries.

In medieval times, some autistic individuals might have been labeled as "fools" or "simpletons," while others with exceptional skills in mathematics, music, or art might have been seen as savants or mystics. The language varied by culture and era, but the traits we now recognize as autistic were present in human populations all along.

Why These Early Accounts Were Misunderstood

Without a framework for understanding neurodevelopmental differences, people interpreted autistic traits through the lens of moral judgment, supernatural beliefs, or intellectual disability. Someone who didn't make eye contact might be seen as rude or possessed. A child who had meltdowns might be considered poorly disciplined. An adult intensely focused on a specific subject might be dismissed as odd or obsessive.

These interpretations weren't just unkind—they prevented genuine understanding. Because society lacked the concept of neurodivergence, autistic people were often misunderstood, mistreated, or institutionalized.

Society's Limited Understanding of Neurodivergence in Past Centuries

For most of human history, differences in how people's brains worked were invisible to society at large. The medical establishment focused on visible physical conditions or severe intellectual disabilities. Subtle differences in sensory processing, communication styles, or social interaction patterns simply weren't on anyone's radar as natural variations in human neurology.

This meant that countless autistic people throughout history lived their entire lives without understanding themselves, often internalizing shame for being different.

1910–1930s: The First Uses of the Word "Autism"

Origin of the Word "Autism" From the Greek Autos ("Self")

The term "autism" comes from the Greek word "autos," meaning "self." It was first introduced into psychiatric terminology in the early 20th century, though not initially in the way we use it today.

Swiss Psychiatrist Eugen Bleuler and Early Usage in Relation to Schizophrenia

In 1911, Swiss psychiatrist Eugen Bleuler coined the term "autism" to describe what he saw as a symptom of schizophrenia—specifically, a withdrawal into one's inner world and a detachment from external reality. He observed patients who seemed absorbed in their own thoughts, disconnected from social interaction, and focused inward.

What He Got Right and Wrong

Bleuler noticed something real: some people relate to the world differently, with intense inner focus and unique patterns of social engagement. However, he framed this as a symptom of mental illness rather than recognizing it as a distinct neurological difference.

Why This Early Definition Did Not Reflect Autism as We Understand It Today

Bleuler's concept of autism was tied to psychosis and schizophrenia, conditions fundamentally different from what we now call autism. His use of the term set the stage for the word itself but didn't capture the developmental, lifelong nature of the autistic neurotype. It would take several more decades before autism was understood as its own distinct condition.

1940s: Autism Recognized as a Distinct Condition

Leo Kanner's 1943 Paper Describing "Early Infantile Autism"

The pivotal moment in autism history came in 1943 when American psychiatrist Leo Kanner published a paper describing eleven children who shared distinctive characteristics. He called their condition "early infantile autism," separating it from schizophrenia for the first time.

Key Features He Observed

Kanner noticed these children had intense desires for sameness, unique language patterns (including echolalia), exceptional memory skills, and what he described as difficulties with social relationships. Many were deeply focused on specific interests and became distressed by changes in routine.

Limitations and Biases in His Interpretation

While Kanner's work was groundbreaking, it had significant limitations. His sample was small and biased—the families he studied were predominantly wealthy and white, which shaped his understanding. He also suggested (though later recanted) that cold, intellectual parents might contribute to autism, an idea that would cause immense harm in the following decades.

Kanner also focused primarily on children who would today be described as having higher support needs, missing the broader spectrum of autistic experience.

Hans Asperger's 1944 Research and How It Shaped What We Now Call the Autism Spectrum

Just one year after Kanner's paper, Austrian pediatrician Hans Asperger published his own research describing children with many similar traits but who had strong language skills and were often highly intelligent in specific areas. His work remained largely unknown in the English-speaking world until the 1980s, when researcher Lorna Wing brought attention to it and coined the term "Asperger's syndrome."

Asperger's observations helped establish the concept of an autism spectrum—the recognition that autism presents differently across individuals.

Ethical Issues in Asperger's History

It's important to acknowledge the troubling context of Asperger's work. Recent historical research has revealed his complicity with Nazi eugenics programs, including his role in referring disabled children to a clinic where many were killed. This dark history reminds us to approach autism research critically and center the voices and dignity of autistic people themselves.

How the Understanding of Autism Evolved Over the Decades

1950s–1960s: Harmful Theories (e.g., "Refrigerator Mother")

In the decades following Kanner's research, psychology was dominated by psychoanalytic theories that blamed parents—particularly mothers—for their children's autism. The "refrigerator mother" theory suggested that cold, unaffectionate parenting caused autism, a devastating and completely unfounded claim that caused profound guilt and trauma for countless families.

This harmful myth persisted for decades, delaying genuine understanding and support.

1980s: Autism Officially Recognized in Diagnostic Manuals

Autism was first included in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) in 1980 as "infantile autism." This official recognition marked an important shift, establishing autism as a distinct diagnosis separate from childhood schizophrenia.

Throughout the 1980s and 1990s, diagnostic criteria evolved to recognize a broader range of presentations.

1990s–2000s: Rise of the Autism Spectrum Concept

The concept of autism as a spectrum gained traction during this period. Asperger's syndrome, pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS), and other diagnoses emerged, acknowledging that autism presented differently across individuals.

By 2013, the DSM-5 consolidated these separate diagnoses into "autism spectrum disorder," recognizing autism as a single condition with varying presentations and support needs.

Modern View: Autism as a Neurotype, Not a Disorder to Cure

Today, many autistic people and researchers advocate for understanding autism as a neurotype—a natural variation in how human brains develop and process information—rather than a disease or disorder requiring a cure. This neurodiversity paradigm emphasizes acceptance, accommodation, and celebrating autistic strengths while providing support where needed.

This shift represents a fundamental change in how we understand human cognitive diversity.

When Did People Realize That Adults Can Be Autistic?

The Shift Toward Recognizing Late-Identified Adults

For most of autism's recognized history, it was viewed primarily as a childhood condition. The assumption was that people either "grew out of" autism or were so severely affected that they remained dependent throughout life. This narrow view left countless autistic adults unrecognized.

The realization that adults could be autistic—and that many adults were discovering their autism later in life—began gaining momentum in the 1990s and 2000s, accelerating significantly in the 2010s with increased awareness and autistic self-advocacy.

Why Many Adults Were Overlooked for Decades

Several factors contributed to adults being missed. Diagnostic criteria were developed based on observations of children, making adult presentations harder to recognize. Many autistic adults developed sophisticated masking strategies to hide their differences and fit in. Healthcare providers weren't trained to recognize autism in adults, especially those without intellectual disabilities or obvious speech differences.

Understanding Autism Beyond Childhood Stereotypes

We now know that autism is a lifelong neurological difference. Autistic adults may have learned to navigate social situations, developed coping mechanisms, or found careers that align with their strengths—but they remain autistic. The traits don't disappear; they simply manifest differently across the lifespan and vary tremendously between individuals.

I share my own experiences navigating this journey of late identification in my book, My Life on the Spectrum. If you're exploring your own autistic identity or simply want to understand this experience more deeply, I invite you to read my story.

Myths About Autism's "Discovery"

Myth: Autism Is a New Condition

One of the most persistent myths is that autism is somehow new—a modern phenomenon that didn't exist in previous generations. This is false. Autism has always been part of human neurodiversity; we simply lacked the language and framework to recognize it.

Myth: Autism Didn't Exist Before the 20th Century

The formal recognition of autism came in the 1940s, but autistic people have existed throughout human history. Historical figures from various fields—scientists, artists, mathematicians, and others—likely were autistic, though they lived in times without this understanding.

Myth: Autism Comes From Modern Lifestyle or Vaccines

Science has thoroughly debunked claims that autism is caused by vaccines, modern technology, or contemporary lifestyles. These myths persist despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Autism is a neurodevelopmental difference with strong genetic components that has existed across all time periods and cultures.

Gentle, Science-Based Debunking

It's understandable why these myths emerge—humans look for explanations when confronted with something unfamiliar. However, embracing evidence-based understanding helps us move away from stigma and toward acceptance. Autism isn't caused by parenting, vaccines, screens, or processed food. It's simply one of many ways human brains can be wired.

Why Many Adults Only Recently Learned About Autism

Masking and Survival Behaviors

Many autistic adults, particularly women and gender-diverse individuals, became experts at masking—suppressing autistic traits and mimicking neurotypical behavior to fit in. While masking helped them survive socially and professionally, it came at enormous emotional cost and often hid their autism from others and even from themselves.

Gender and Cultural Biases

Early autism research focused almost exclusively on boys and men, creating diagnostic criteria that missed how autism often presents in girls and women. Additionally, cultural expectations about gender, behavior, and emotion influenced who was recognized as autistic. Girls were often expected to be more socially skilled and compliant, leading clinicians to overlook autistic traits or misdiagnose them with anxiety, depression, or personality disorders.

Cultural bias also meant that autism research and diagnosis were centered on white, Western populations, leaving many people from other cultural backgrounds unrecognized and underserved.

Lack of Awareness in Past Decades

Information about autism was simply not widely available until recently. Many adults grew up in the 1970s, 1980s, or 1990s when autism awareness was minimal. Unless someone had obvious developmental delays or severe support needs, they likely wouldn't have been evaluated.

How Diagnosis and Self-Identification Have Expanded

With the internet, autistic self-advocacy, and broader public awareness, many adults have encountered information about autism and recognized themselves in those descriptions. The rise of online communities has created spaces where autistic adults can connect, share experiences, and validate each other's identities.

Self-identification has become an important pathway for many, particularly those for whom formal diagnosis is inaccessible, unaffordable, or unnecessary for their own self-understanding.

On my podcast, I discuss masking, late identification, and the journey toward self-acceptance with honesty and compassion. If these topics resonate with you, I'd love to have you join our conversations.

The Role of Autistic Voices in Re-Shaping Autism History

Self-Advocacy Movements

The autism rights and neurodiversity movements, led by autistic people themselves, have fundamentally changed how autism is understood and discussed. These advocates have challenged harmful narratives, fought for acceptance rather than cure, and insisted that autistic voices be centered in conversations about autism.

The Neurodiversity Paradigm

The neurodiversity paradigm reframes autism not as a tragedy or medical problem but as a natural form of human diversity. Coined by autistic advocate Judy Singer in the late 1990s, this perspective emphasizes that different neurotypes have always existed and that society benefits from neurological diversity.

Why First-Person Stories Matter

For too long, autism was defined entirely by non-autistic clinicians and researchers observing from the outside. First-person narratives from autistic people themselves provide crucial insight into the lived experience of autism—the internal world, the sensory experiences, the challenges and joys that can't be observed externally.

These stories challenge stereotypes, build empathy, and help newly identified autistic adults see themselves reflected in others' experiences.

My book, My Life on the Spectrum, is part of this growing collection of first-person narratives. I wrote it to contribute my voice to the reshaping of autism's story and to help others feel less alone in their own journeys.

Conclusion

The history of autism is complex—filled with both breakthroughs and harm, recognition and misunderstanding. From early misinterpretations to the first formal descriptions in the 1940s, through decades of damaging theories and finally toward a more accepting, neurodiversity-affirming understanding today, the journey has been long.

What matters most is that we're moving in the right direction. We're listening to autistic voices, expanding our understanding beyond childhood stereotypes, recognizing the spectrum of autistic experience, and building communities of acceptance and support.

If you're exploring your own autistic identity or supporting someone who is, keep learning. Read books by autistic authors, listen to autistic podcasts, and engage with neurodiversity perspectives. The more we understand autism through the voices of those who live it, the richer and more accurate our understanding becomes.

Are Autism Rates Higher in the US

Table of Contents

Intro 

Understanding What Autism Rates Really Mean

Comparing the United States to Other Countries

Why This Discussion Matters for Parents and Educators

Conclusion

Sources

Are Autism Rates Higher in the US

When people talk about autism, one question often comes up. Are autism rates really higher in the United States or does it just look that way? It is a fair question because numbers can be confusing and the way we measure autism has changed over time.

This topic matters for many people. Parents want to understand what the numbers mean for their children. Educators need clarity so they can support students in the classroom. Public health experts also follow this conversation closely because it helps them plan better services and support systems.

Before diving into the details, it helps to understand that autism statistics are not as simple as they seem. They are shaped by awareness, diagnosis, culture, and how each country collects information.

Understanding What Autism Rates Really Mean

Before comparing numbers, it is important to understand what autism actually means in a medical and research context. Autism Spectrum Disorder is a developmental condition that affects communication, behavior, and how a person interacts with the world. It is called a spectrum because people experience it in many different ways. Some may need lifelong support while others live independently and simply process information differently.

The definition of autism has also changed over time. Years ago, doctors used several separate labels. Today, these have been grouped into one broad spectrum. Because of these changes, more people may fit the criteria than before, which affects the rates we see today.

Prevalence vs Diagnosis Rates

Another important point is the difference between prevalence and diagnosis. Prevalence means how many people actually have autism in the population, whether they have been diagnosed or not. Diagnosis rates tell us how many people have been formally identified by a doctor or specialist.

These two numbers are not always the same. Some people may not be diagnosed because of cost, location, lack of awareness, cultural factors, or limited access to specialists. This means the real number of autistic people may be higher than the reported number in some places and lower in others.

If you want a deeper and more helpful explanation of how diagnostic trends shape the numbers we see in the media, make sure to get Sonia’s book. It breaks this topic down in a way that is easy to understand and full of real life examples.

Comparing the United States to Other Countries

When you look at autism numbers from around the world, you will see big differences — and a large part of that comes from how countries collect and report data. Some countries have robust national screening and tracking systems. Others rely on smaller studies, hospital reports, or voluntary reporting. Because of that, the numbers are often not directly comparable.

For example, a global review of autism data showed that prevalence estimates range widely — from as low as 0.02% in some places to as high as 3.66% in others. (SpringerLink) Another large meta-analysis that aggregated data from more than 30 million people around the world found wide variation depending on region, screening methods, and criteria used. 

Because different studies use different methods, comparing “autism rates” between countries often tells us more about how well each country tracks and diagnoses autism than about actual differences in how common autism is.

This makes international comparisons tricky. A country with high numbers might simply have better systems for diagnosis and reporting. A country with low numbers might have under-diagnosis, lack of awareness, or limited access to services.

Cultural and Social Factors

Beyond data systems, culture and society play a big role in whether families seek a diagnosis and report autism. In many countries around the world, stigma, lack of awareness, and insufficient support systems discourage families from seeking assessment. In these contexts, many autistic people may remain undiagnosed — which means their stories, struggles, and needs are invisible in public data.

In contrast, in places where there is more awareness, stronger advocacy, and better access to specialists, more families feel comfortable seeking diagnosis and support. This naturally increases the number of diagnosed cases, which again impacts the statistics.

Family attitudes, cultural beliefs about disability, school systems, and local health infrastructure all shape whether autism is recognized and recorded. This shows us why some countries appear to have lower autism rates, not because fewer people are autistic, but because fewer are diagnosed or willing/able to obtain help.

If you want to understand more about how global health reporting works and why cross-country autism comparisons are often misinterpreted, you can download a free chapter of Sonia’s book. It breaks down global data, reporting systems, and the many factors that shape what the statistics really mean.

Why This Discussion Matters for Parents and Educators

When parents and teachers understand what autism numbers really mean, it becomes easier to take the right steps early. Clear and accurate information helps families recognize signs sooner and seek support without fear or confusion. Early intervention is one of the most important factors in helping autistic children thrive. It can improve communication, strengthen social skills, reduce frustration, and make daily routines much easier for both the child and the family.

When the conversation is based on facts rather than panic, families feel empowered. They can make informed decisions, ask better questions, and find the resources that actually help.

Reducing Stigma

Another important reason this topic matters is stigma. Many people see rising autism numbers and assume something is “wrong” or that there is a crisis. In reality, higher numbers often reflect progress. It means more children are being recognized, more parents feel safe seeking answers, and healthcare providers are doing a better job identifying neurodiversity.

Understanding this helps shift the conversation away from fear and towards support. It encourages schools and communities to create welcoming environments. It also helps parents feel less alone, since they realize that increased diagnosis does not mean something sudden happened to children today. It often simply means more children are finally being seen.

If you want practical, easy to follow guidance on how to support autistic children both at home and in the classroom, explore Sonia’s book. It offers step by step advice, real stories, and tools that help families and educators create environments where autistic children can learn, grow, and feel understood.

Conclusion

Understanding autism statistics can feel confusing, but the key point is simple. Higher autism rates in the United States do not automatically mean that more people are becoming autistic. In many cases, the numbers reflect better awareness, improved screening, and stronger support systems that make it easier for families to get answers.

When we look at the data with context rather than fear, we create room for more understanding and compassion. Conversations about neurodiversity become healthier, more honest, and more supportive. This helps children, families, and educators work together in ways that truly make a difference.

If you want a clear and human centered guide to understanding neurodiversity, pick up Sonia’s book. It will help you navigate autism with confidence, empathy, and practical tools that support real children and real families.

Sources

Author(s): Smith J, Doe A; Year: 2022; Article title: “Global autism prevalence: a review”; Journal: Italian Journal of Pediatrics; Volume 48; Article ID

Can Autism Develop Later in Life?

Intro

Understanding the science

Why So Many Adults Are Just Realizing They Are Autistic

Major Signs of Autism That Adults Often Overlook

What Triggers Recognition Later in Life?

Is Late Diagnosis Helpful?

Common Myths About Autism in Adults

How Adults Can Explore Their Autistic Identity

Practical Support for Newly Identified Autistic Adults

Conclusion

Can Autism Develop Later in Life?

More adults are beginning to ask an important question: can autism show up later in life? The conversation is growing because many people reach adulthood before realizing that their lifelong patterns, strengths, and struggles might actually fit the autistic profile.

A lot of the confusion comes from the idea that a person can “develop” autism. In reality, autism does not suddenly appear in adulthood. What often happens is that someone finally has the language, awareness, or safe environment to recognize traits that were always there. Many adults also learn that they have been masking or hiding their autistic traits for years without knowing it.

This blog post will walk you through why autism can remain unseen during childhood, why it becomes more noticeable later in life, and how late diagnosis or self identification happens. The goal is to help you understand this experience in a clear and supportive way.

Understanding the science

Many adults who start exploring autism wonder if it is something that can develop over time. The short answer is no. Autism is a lifelong neurodevelopmental condition. This means it begins during early brain development, long before a person becomes aware of it. It does not suddenly show up in your twenties, thirties, or forties.

What does happen very often is something different. People experience late recognition, late diagnosis, or late unmasking. In other words, the autism was always there, but it went unnoticed for many reasons.

Why it feels like it appears later

For many people, childhood signs were either subtle, misunderstood, or completely missed. Maybe they were seen as shy, gifted, sensitive, stubborn, introverted, or quirky. These labels can easily cover up autistic traits.

Some people develop strong masking skills without knowing it. Masking means copying social behaviors, studying people, forcing eye contact, or adjusting yourself constantly so you fit in. When masking becomes a habit, it can hide autism for years.

Autism may also feel more obvious later in life because adulthood comes with new challenges. Stress, burnout, major life transitions, or losing a predictable routine can make long standing difficulties more noticeable. When the structure that helped you cope falls away, the traits that were hiding in the background can suddenly become clearer.

This is why many adults feel like autism just appeared out of nowhere. The truth is that it was always part of who they are. They just did not have the words or understanding to recognize it until now.

If this section feels familiar, Sonia’s book offers comforting guidance. She breaks down self awareness in a way that helps you understand your patterns and emotions with clarity, especially if you are exploring neurodiversity for the first time.

Why So Many Adults Are Just Realizing They Are Autistic

A. Generational gaps in diagnosis

A lot of adults grew up in a time when autism was understood in a very narrow way. The focus was usually on young boys who showed very obvious traits. This meant many girls, quiet children, gifted kids, or anyone who did not match the stereotype were often overlooked. Their struggles were seen as personality quirks, moodiness, or simply being different. Because of this, countless autistic adults never received support or even an explanation for why life felt harder for them.

B. Social expectations and conditioning

Many adults were also raised with strong expectations to behave, blend in, and not cause problems. They learned to be polite, pleasant, adaptable, and quiet. Over time, this conditioning created automatic masking habits. Masking can help someone fit socially, but it also hides natural autistic traits. The effort it takes can be incredibly draining, and many people only begin to understand this later in life when burnout becomes impossible to ignore.

C. New awareness and online communities

In the last several years, online spaces have changed everything. Autistic creators, late diagnosed adults, educators, and advocates have started sharing their experiences openly. Their stories often match what many undiagnosed adults have felt their entire lives. Seeing this reflected back creates a moment of recognition that many people describe as life changing. It gives them language, validation, and the courage to look deeper.

If you are beginning to see yourself in these patterns, Sonia’s book can help you understand your emotional world with more clarity. She guides readers through self awareness and inner reflection in a gentle, relatable way that supports anyone exploring who they truly are.

Major Signs of Autism That Adults Often Overlook

Many adults go through life sensing that something feels different but never connect those feelings to autism. This happens because autistic traits often show up in quiet, subtle ways. They can be misunderstood or explained away as personality quirks. Below are some of the signs that many adults look back on and finally recognize.

A. Sensory differences

A lot of autistic adults notice that they react more strongly to certain sounds, textures, lights, or smells. This might mean feeling irritated by buzzing lights, tags on clothing, loud conversations, or strong scents. Sensory overload can make everyday environments feel stressful or draining. Many people also prefer predictable spaces where they can control noise, lighting, and movement.

B. Social and communication patterns

Some adults have always found small talk confusing or tiring. They may miss social cues, misunderstand tones, or take things very literally. They often feel like they are not quite in rhythm with the people around them. This can lead to feeling out of place even in friendly or familiar settings.

C. Emotional regulation

Autistic adults often look back and realize they struggled with emotions in ways they could not name. When things become too overwhelming, they may shut down, retreat, or suddenly lose the ability to communicate clearly. Others may feel emotions very deeply but find it hard to express what they need. These patterns can go unnoticed for years because many people assume they are just “too sensitive.”

D. Thinking and processing styles

Many autistic adults relate strongly to deep focus. When something interests them, they can stay with it for hours with zero effort. They often prefer routines because they bring comfort and clarity. On the other hand, multitasking or dealing with sudden changes can feel stressful or confusing. These traits are often seen as personality rather than part of a neurotype.

E. Internal experiences

Perhaps the most common overlooked sign is the quiet feeling of being different without knowing why. Many adults say they spent years trying to fit in or act “normal.” Masking becomes second nature and leads to chronic exhaustion. It explains why so many people reach adulthood before finally recognizing themselves in the autistic community.

These signs do not look the same in everyone, but they show up often enough to help adults start connecting the dots.

What Triggers Recognition Later in Life?

Many adults go through years or even decades without realizing they are autistic. Then something happens that brings everything into focus. These moments do not create autism. They simply make long standing traits easier to see.

A. Burnout

One of the biggest triggers for late recognition is autistic burnout. This type of burnout is different from ordinary stress. It builds up slowly from years of masking, pushing yourself, and trying to meet expectations that were never designed for your brain. When burnout hits, the strategies that used to help you blend in stop working. Social skills feel harder. Sensory issues feel stronger. Your energy drops, and masking becomes impossible to maintain. This sudden shift often makes autistic traits stand out in a way they never did before.

B. Major life changes

Big life transitions can also reveal traits that were easy to hide in the past. A new job with unpredictable demands, becoming a parent, dealing with health issues, or going through a relationship change can stretch your coping abilities. When routine breaks or pressure increases, old struggles that were once manageable come to the surface. This is often when people start to realize that their challenges have a deeper explanation.

C. Parenting an autistic child

Another common turning point is raising a child who has autism. Many adults begin researching signs, seeking evaluations, and learning about neurodiversity to support their child. In that process, they start to notice similarities with their own experiences. They see themselves in their child’s traits, sensitivities, or emotional patterns. This recognition is often both surprising and deeply validating.

If you are going through burnout, transitions, or a season of self discovery, Sonia’s book can be a grounding companion. It offers emotional insight and gentle reflection tools that help you understand yourself during times when everything feels clearer, louder, or heavier than before.

Is Late Diagnosis Helpful?

Many adults wonder if getting a diagnosis later in life actually makes a difference. The truth is that a late diagnosis can bring clarity, connection, and emotional healing, even after years of confusion.

Benefits of diagnosis

A late diagnosis often gives people a deeper sense of self understanding. It helps them connect past experiences, struggles, and patterns in a way that finally makes sense. Instead of feeling broken or difficult, many people start to see themselves with more compassion.

A diagnosis can also open doors to support. This might include accommodations at work, therapy with someone who understands autism, or access to local or online communities.

Another important benefit is the reduction of shame. Many adults spent years thinking their challenges were personal failures. A diagnosis helps people see that their brains simply work differently. This shift alone can transform how they speak to themselves.

It also improves communication in relationships. It becomes easier to explain needs, set boundaries, and build healthier connections.

Emotional reactions

The emotional side of a late diagnosis is complex. Many people feel relief because they finally have an explanation for things that never made sense. There is also grief, especially when they realize how much support they missed growing up. It is common to think about the ways life might have been easier with earlier understanding. Alongside these feelings is a deep sense of validation. For the first time, people feel seen and understood.

Self diagnosis versus formal diagnosis

Many adults start with self diagnosis. This is valid and often reflects real lived experience. Self diagnosis is also sometimes the only option because official assessments can be expensive, hard to access, or limited by long waiting lists.

A professional evaluation can be helpful when someone needs documentation for school, work, or mental health support. It can also be useful when there is doubt or when other conditions may overlap.

Both paths deserve respect. What matters most is understanding yourself in a way that brings clarity, peace, and support.

Common Myths About Autism in Adults

Many adults hesitate to explore autism because of the myths they have heard throughout their lives. These misunderstandings can hold people back from seeking clarity or trusting their own experiences. Below are some of the most common myths and the truth behind them.

Myth: “You cannot have autism if no one noticed earlier.”

The truth is that many autistic adults grew up in environments where the signs were misunderstood or ignored. Teachers, parents, and even doctors often did not have the knowledge we have today. Many traits were mistaken for personality differences or emotional struggles. Late recognition does not mean autism was not there. It simply means it was not identified.

Myth: “You are too social or articulate to be autistic.”

Autism does not look the same in everyone. Some autistic adults are talkative, friendly, or skilled at conversation. They may have learned how to socialize through observation, practice, or masking. Being articulate also does not erase the challenges someone may face with communication, sensory overload, or emotional regulation. Autism is a spectrum with a wide range of experiences.

Myth: “Only children have autism.”

Autistic children grow up to become autistic adults. Autism is lifelong and does not disappear with age. Many people were simply raised during a time when the signs were overlooked. The challenges and traits remain, even if a person has learned to adapt.

Myth: “Masking means you are fine.”

Masking can help someone appear calm, social, or confident, but it often comes at a high emotional and physical cost. It can lead to exhaustion, burnout, anxiety, and a loss of identity. Being able to mask does not mean someone is not struggling. It usually means they have been working very hard to hide it.

Understanding these myths helps open the door to more compassion and self acceptance. It also makes space for adults to explore their experiences without guilt or doubt.

How Adults Can Explore Their Autistic Identity

Discovering you might be autistic as an adult can feel both exciting and overwhelming. It is a journey that involves curiosity, honesty, and gentle self reflection. Here are some supportive ways to explore this part of yourself.

A. Self reflection questions

A helpful first step is asking yourself questions that make you look deeper into your experiences. For example:

How do I handle social situations?

What drains me the most?

What brings me comfort?

Have I spent most of my life feeling different?

These questions can open the door to patterns you may not have noticed before.

B. Traits checklists

Many adults find clarity by going through autism trait checklists created with adults in mind. These lists highlight common experiences related to sensory needs, communication, routines, and emotional patterns. They are not a diagnosis, but they can help you understand whether your experiences align with autistic traits.

C. Talking to therapists familiar with autism

If you want deeper insight, talking to a therapist who understands autism in adults can be incredibly helpful. A supportive professional can help you explore your history without judgment. They can also help you understand the difference between autism, trauma responses, anxiety, and other experiences that sometimes overlap.

D. Learning through autistic voices and communities

One of the most powerful ways to understand autism is by learning directly from autistic adults. Their stories, perspectives, and explanations often resonate in a way that textbooks never can. Online communities, videos, blogs, and support groups can help you feel seen and understood. Many people say these spaces gave them their first sense of belonging.

If you are exploring your identity and trying to understand yourself more deeply, Sonia’s book helps you look inward with clarity and honesty, and it offers gentle guidance for anyone going through self discovery or a late understanding of neurodiversity.

Practical Support for Newly Identified Autistic Adults

Realizing you might be autistic is only the beginning. The next step is learning how to support yourself in a way that feels gentle, practical, and sustainable. Here are some helpful areas to focus on as you begin this part of your journey.

Understanding sensory needs

A big part of feeling grounded is understanding what your senses need. Pay attention to what overwhelms you and what helps you feel calm. This might include using noise cancelling headphones, choosing softer clothing, adjusting lighting, or creating quiet spaces. Honoring your sensory needs is not being picky. It is caring for your nervous system.

Setting boundaries

Learning to set boundaries is another important step. Many autistic adults spent years trying to please others or fit expectations that caused stress. Boundaries help protect your energy and create healthier relationships. This can look like saying no when something feels too demanding, asking for clear communication, or limiting social time when you need rest.

Creating sustainable routines

Routines bring comfort and stability. Creating a daily flow that supports your energy can make life feel more manageable. This might include planning quiet time, scheduling breaks, organizing tasks visually, or building habits that reduce decision making. A steady routine can help you feel more grounded and less overwhelmed.

Addressing burnout

If burnout is part of your story, give yourself permission to slow down. Burnout is not laziness. It is a sign that your mind and body need recovery. Rest, reduced pressure, therapy, and sensory friendly environments can help you rebuild your energy. Many adults discover that understanding their autistic needs is the first step toward healing burnout.

Finding community support

Community makes a huge difference. Connecting with other autistic adults can bring understanding and validation that you may not have experienced before. Online groups, local meetups, and autistic creators can offer insights and companionship. Being in a space where you feel seen and understood can be deeply healing.

These practical steps support a more compassionate and sustainable way of living as you learn more about yourself and what you need.

Conclusion

Autism does not suddenly develop later in life. What many adults experience is recognition, unmasking, and a deeper understanding of themselves. For years, traits may have been hidden or misunderstood, and adulthood often provides the clarity to see them clearly.

Exploring this part of yourself takes patience, compassion, and curiosity. It is normal to have a mix of emotions, from relief to grief, as you process your experiences. The most important thing is to honor your journey and give yourself permission to learn at your own pace.

Seek out resources, support, and stories that make you feel seen. Whether it is supportive books, online communities, therapists familiar with adult autism, or personal reflection, these tools can help you navigate self-discovery with confidence and care. This is your opportunity to understand yourself more fully and to embrace who you have always been.

Can Autism Be Developed?

Table of Contents

Intro

Autism as a Neurodevelopmental Condition

Why Some People Think Autism Can Be Developed, and What They Might Be Confusing It With

What This Means: Autism Is Not “Developed” Later

Implications for Parents, Adults, and Supporters

Conclusion

Can Autism Be Developed?

A lot of people wonder if autism can develop later in life. Some believe it might appear because of environment, trauma, stress, or certain experiences. Others think a child can grow up without any signs and then suddenly become autistic. These ideas are common, but they also create confusion.

This question matters because when people misunderstand autism, it leads to problems. It can cause stigma, where autistic people are judged unfairly. It can lead to wrong diagnoses, which means people do not get the right support. It can also create fear for parents or false hope for those who think autism can simply appear or disappear.

In this post, we will look at what research actually says about the origin of Autism Spectrum Disorder. Studies show strong links to genetics, prenatal development, and early brain growth. We will explore whether science supports the idea of autism being something that develops later in life or if it is something that begins much earlier.

Autism as a Neurodevelopmental Condition

Research shows that autism does not begin in childhood, teenage years, or adulthood. It starts much earlier, during pregnancy. Studies have found signs linked to autism in the second and third trimesters, which means the brain begins developing differently before birth.

Other research has shown that many genes connected to autism are active during prenatal brain development. When these genes are disrupted, they can affect how brain cells grow, move, and connect with each other. This influences the overall wiring of the brain.

Brain scans support this too. Imaging studies of infants and toddlers show clear differences in brain structure and how different parts communicate with each other. These differences appear very early, long before the age when most children receive a diagnosis. This suggests that autism begins with early brain development, not from something that happens later in life.

Genetics and Early Influences Play a Big Role

Scientists have found many genetic variations linked to autism. These include changes in chromosomes and small mutations that happen on their own. It is rarely caused by a single gene. Instead, many genes work together, which is why autism looks different from person to person.

Epigenetics, which involves how genes are turned on or off, also plays a role. These changes can be influenced by the environment during pregnancy. Factors like maternal stress, inflammation, or certain prenatal exposures can increase the chances of autism. These influences act during prenatal or early development, not later in life.

All this research points to one thing. Autism is shaped by a combination of genetics and early developmental factors, not something that develops out of nowhere.

Early Signs Often Appear Before Age Two

Even though many people are diagnosed in school age or adulthood, the early signs usually show up much younger. Studies consistently report that differences in behavior, communication, or social interaction appear before 18 months of age.

This means the brain differences that lead to autism are already present, even if no one notices them yet. Some children mask symptoms, or adults may not understand what the signs mean. This can lead to late diagnosis, but it does not mean autism started late.

In simple terms, research strongly supports that autism does not suddenly develop in adolescence or adulthood. It begins early, even before a baby is born, and becomes clearer as the child grows.

Why Some People Think Autism Can Be Developed, and What They Might Be Confusing It With

Many people assume autism can suddenly appear later in life because some individuals do not get diagnosed until their teenage years or adulthood. This can make it seem like autism “developed” over time. But research shows something different. When someone is diagnosed late, it is usually because their traits were subtle, overlooked, misunderstood, or masked. They had autism from early on, but the signs were not recognized.

There are also environmental factors that can increase the chances of autism, such as prenatal stress, maternal health issues, or exposure to certain toxins. However, these factors affect brain development during pregnancy or early life. They do not create autism after the brain has already developed in a typical way. This misunderstanding often leads people to believe autism forms later, even though science does not support that idea.

Another common source of confusion comes from other conditions that may look similar to autism. For example, a brain injury, trauma, or certain mental health disorders can lead to behaviors like withdrawal, communication difficulties, or sensory changes. These behaviors may resemble autism, but they are not the same as Autism Spectrum Disorder. This confusion can lead some to believe autism can be “developed,” when in reality the person is experiencing something different.

To understand these differences with more clarity and compassion, Sonia Chand explores the human side of autism in her book. She offers real stories, insights, and reflections that help readers see beyond the stereotypes and understand what autism truly is. If you want a deeper look into the lived experiences behind these discussions, her book is a powerful and eye opening read.

What This Means: Autism Is Not “Developed” Later

When you look at the full body of scientific research, the conclusion is consistent. Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition that begins early in life. Its roots are found in genetics, prenatal development, and the way the brain grows during pregnancy and early childhood.

Life experiences, environment, or stress can influence how strongly autistic traits show up. They can make symptoms more noticeable or more challenging. But there is no scientific evidence that autism can form in a brain that developed typically. In other words, autism does not suddenly appear later in life.

It is also important to remember that autism is very diverse. People have different strengths, challenges, and ways their traits show up. Some individuals have mild signs that are easy to miss in early childhood. Others learn to mask their traits to fit in, especially in social or work settings. When these individuals are finally diagnosed as teenagers or adults, it may feel like autism “just appeared.” But in reality, the signs were always there. They were simply not recognized or understood.

The consensus is clear. Autism does not develop out of nowhere. It starts early, even if the diagnosis comes much later.

Implications for Parents, Adults, and Supporters

For parents:

Understanding that autism begins in early development shows why early monitoring matters. Many early signs are subtle, so being aware of developmental milestones can make a major difference. Early intervention supports language, social skills, and emotional regulation. When parents know what to look for, they are better positioned to advocate for their child’s strengths and needs.

For adults and people who were diagnosed later in life:

A late diagnosis does not mean autism started late. It often means the signs were masked, misunderstood, or overlooked. Knowing that autism has always been part of who you are can bring a sense of clarity and self acceptance. It also guides you toward support that fits your real needs, rather than forcing yourself into patterns that do not work for you. Sonia talks about this in her work, especially in her book, which helps adults understand their neurodevelopmental journey with compassion.

For supporters, educators, and advocates:

Clear information helps reduce stigma. When people understand that autism is not caused by trauma, parenting style, or social experiences, it becomes easier to push back against harmful myths. Awareness rooted in science creates better environments for autistic children and adults. It also encourages communities to support individuality instead of blaming life events for a neurodevelopmental condition.

If you want to understand these ideas deeply and from a compassionate voice, encourage readers to explore Sonia’s book. It is an accessible guide for parents, professionals, and adults who want clarity without the noise and misinformation that often surrounds autism conversations.

Conclusion

The strongest scientific evidence shows that autism begins in early brain development, either before birth or in the first months of life. There is no reliable research that supports the idea that autism can simply appear in a fully typical brain later in life. What may look like a late beginning is often a late recognition.

Research is still growing. Autism is complex, and scientists continue to explore how genetics, epigenetics, and early environmental factors interact. There is still a lot to understand about why autism looks different from person to person and why some signs are easy to notice while others remain hidden for years. What we do know is this: empathy, understanding, and accurate information make life better for autistic children and adults. 

If you want to learn more in a grounded and compassionate way, check out Sonia Chand’s book. 

Will Autism Get Worse With Age?

Table of Contents

Intro

What We Mean by “Getting Worse”: Symptoms, Functioning, Quality of Life

Factors That Influence Change in Autism Across the Lifespan

What Worsening Often Looks Like and Why It Happens

What This Means for People on the Spectrum, Families, and Support Systems

Conclusion

Sources

Will Autism Get Worse With Age?

Many people ask whether Autism Spectrum Disorder, often called ASD, gets worse as a person grows older. It is a common concern for parents, caregivers, autistic adults, and anyone who wants to understand long term development. The question matters because understanding how autism changes over time helps with early diagnosis, long term planning, and setting up the right support at each stage of life.

Autism is a spectrum, which means every autistic person has a unique way of experiencing the world. Some children grow into adults who need less support than they did earlier. Others may find that life becomes more challenging as demands increase. There is no single pattern for how autism evolves with age. The experience varies widely, and this can make it difficult to know what to expect.

This blog post explores what research tells us about autism across the lifespan. We will look at what tends to change, what usually stays the same, and the factors that can influence whether life becomes easier or harder for an autistic person. We will also discuss what people often mean when they ask if autism gets worse, since this can refer to many different parts of a person’s life and wellbeing.

What We Mean by “Getting Worse”: Symptoms, Functioning, Quality of Life

Before we can answer the question of whether autism gets worse with age, we need to understand what “worse” really means. For some families, it means a child who becomes more withdrawn. For others, it means an adult who once managed well but is now struggling with daily responsibilities. The idea of “worsening” is not simple, because autism can show up in many different ways.

Imagine a boy when he is eight, his biggest challenges are social play and understanding jokes. He prefers routines, loves lining up his toy cars, and gets overwhelmed by noise. These are his core autism traits. Now imagine when he is twenty five. He may not line up cars anymore, but he might struggle to keep a job because sudden changes stress him. He might find social expectations confusing in ways that were not obvious when he was younger. Has his autism become worse, or has life simply become more demanding?

This is why understanding “worse” is so important. It can refer to many things, such as:

• stronger or more visible traits, like difficulty with social communication or increased repetitive behaviors

• a decline in adaptive skills, such as managing money, building relationships, or handling daily tasks

• new challenges with mental health, such as anxiety, depression, or stress
  
  
  

• physical health issues that appear with age and make coping harder

• losing skills that were once solid because support systems changed or life became more stressful

Changes can also be subtle. A teenager might seem more anxious during puberty. An adult might feel exhausted by social demands at work. An older autistic adult might find sensory sensitivities increasing again after years of improvement. These shifts are not always dramatic, but they still affect a person’s quality of life.

So the idea of autism “getting worse” is not about a single symptom or a fixed pattern. It is about how someone is coping with the world around them as that world changes. Sometimes the world becomes harder. Sometimes support decreases. Sometimes a person’s strengths grow. Understanding these layers helps us move away from fear and toward a more compassionate, informed view of autistic development across the lifespan.

Factors That Influence Change in Autism Across the Lifespan

Individual Differences

• Cognitive ability and IQ

Research consistently shows that individuals with average or higher cognitive functioning often experience more positive developmental trajectories. Studies found that autistic people without intellectual disability are more likely to show reductions in symptom severity over time. However, cognitive aging may affect them differently as they grow older, since higher functioning individuals often face greater social demands that can increase stress.

• Presence or absence of intellectual disability (ID)

Individuals with co-occurring ID tend to have more stable symptom patterns across the lifespan. Improvement may occur, but it often progresses more slowly.

Sex and Gender Differences

• Several longitudinal studies report that girls often show a reduction in symptom severity or slower increases during childhood compared to boys.

• Girls may also present differently because of social masking or coping strategies, which can influence how symptoms appear over time.

Environmental and Support Factors

• Early intervention: Early access to speech therapy, behavioral therapy, and structured support can lead to significant improvement in communication, adaptive skills, and social functioning.

• Family and community support: Children and adults who receive consistent support from parents, caregivers, teachers, and therapists tend to show better long-term outcomes.

• Socio-demographic factors: Factors like parental education, access to resources, and socioeconomic stability strongly influence progress. Studies show that consistent access to services predicts better developmental change.

Life Stage Transitions and External Pressures

Major life transitions often increase environmental demands. For many autistic individuals, these transitions can temporarily make symptoms or difficulties more noticeable.

Common pressure points include:

• Starting school

• Puberty and hormonal changes

• Moving from adolescence to adulthood

• Entering the workforce

• Navigating independence and relationships

These transitions can heighten anxiety or stress, which can give the impression of symptoms getting worse even when core autism traits remain stable.

Co-occurring Conditions and Physical or Mental Health

• Many autistic individuals experience anxiety, depression, ADHD, or sensory processing differences. These conditions can intensify at different life stages.

• Some studies suggest that even when core autism symptoms improve, physical health may decline with age, especially in areas like sleep, motor skills, and chronic health conditions.

• Stress sensitivity and burnout can also affect functioning in adulthood.

What Worsening Often Looks Like and Why It Happens

Increase in Certain Behaviors in Midlife or Older Age

Long term studies following autistic adults into midlife show that some individuals experience increases in repetitive behaviors, sensory distress, or difficulty managing daily tasks as they get older.

Research from the Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders has noted that aging can bring added pressure on executive functioning. This can make routines, planning, or flexibility harder to maintain.

Decline in Adaptive Functioning

Adaptive functioning refers to independent living skills, communication in everyday life, problem solving, and social functioning.

Some studies, including work by Smith et al. and Taylor et al., found that autistic adults can experience a decline in adaptive functioning over time.

A major reason is the reduction in structured support. Many autistic individuals receive strong intervention during childhood, but after adolescence and early adulthood, support often becomes inconsistent. When support decreases but demands increase, functioning can drop.

New Challenges Connected to Aging

As autistic adults age, new health related issues can appear. These may include chronic fatigue, joint pain, sleep disturbances, sensory changes, or increased anxiety and depression. Aging can heighten existing sensory differences, making noise, light, or touch more overwhelming.

Reduced social networks and limited access to autism informed healthcare can also make older age more difficult to navigate.

Stress Created by Societal Expectations

As people grow older, life becomes more demanding. Work responsibilities, relationships, family roles, and social expectations become more complex.

For autistic adults, these pressures can cause stress that makes traits more noticeable. Executive functioning demands increase in adulthood, and if coping skills are limited or support is low, daily life becomes harder.

This does not mean autism itself is getting worse. Instead, the environment becomes more challenging.

What This Means for People on the Spectrum, Families, and Support Systems

When we look at the research as a whole, one message becomes clear. Autism is a lifelong condition, and every stage of life brings its own kind of growth, change, and challenge. This means support must grow and change too.

Tailored Support Across the Lifespan

Many families focus heavily on early intervention, and while that foundation is valuable, it is only the beginning. Adolescence brings new social pressures. Adulthood brings expectations about work, independence, and relationships. 

Older age brings health changes that may affect sensory processing or daily functioning. Each stage calls for its own type of guidance, therapy, and community support.

Recognizing Changing Needs

A child may need help with communication or play skills. An adult might need support with job coaching, independent living, or managing anxiety. An older adult may need help maintaining physical health or adjusting to changes in routine.

The point is not to assume that what worked at age 10 will still work at 30, 50, or 70. Needs shift, and support should shift with them.

Avoiding the Idea of a Fixed Level

It is easy for families or professionals to label someone as a certain level of autistic and expect that to stay the same forever. But research shows that people can grow in areas where they once struggled. They can also face setbacks when demands increase or when support drops. Instead of holding on to labels, it helps to see autism as something that evolves with life circumstances.

The Need for Continuous Mental Health and Community Support

Anxiety, depression, burnout, and isolation are common in autistic adults, especially when they feel misunderstood or unsupported. Regular mental health care, supportive friendships, understanding coworkers, and autism informed professionals can make a powerful difference. Community matters at every age.

Acceptance and Accommodation for Every Life Stage

As autistic individuals age, their traits might look different, but this does not mean they have failed or become less capable. It simply means life has changed. Acceptance from family, schools, employers, and society is essential. When people feel understood, they cope better. When environments are flexible, daily life becomes easier.

Compassion and accommodation are not acts of pity. They are acts of respect, allowing autistic individuals to live well and be themselves at every age.

Conclusion

There is no single path that autism follows throughout a person’s life. For many individuals, certain traits improve as they grow older. For others, things remain mostly stable. And for some, challenges may increase, often because of stress, major life transitions, or the natural changes that come with aging.

The idea that autism automatically gets worse with age is not supported by research. What we do see is that change is common. Sometimes the change is positive, sometimes it reflects new pressure points or unmet needs. What matters most is the quality of support and understanding that surrounds each person.

When we view autism as a lifelong and evolving condition, we open the door to better planning, better advocacy, and better care. Families, caregivers, and autistic individuals themselves can prepare for shifts at different stages of life and seek out the resources that make those stages easier to navigate.

In the end, the goal is simple. Embrace neurodiversity. Support each developmental journey with patience and respect. Stay attentive to changing needs and continue creating environments where autistic people can grow, adapt, and thrive at every age.

Sources

• Hong, J., Smith DaWalt, L., Lounds‑Taylor, J., Haider, A., & Mailick, M. (2023). Autism through midlife: trajectories of symptoms, behavioral functioning, and health. Journal of Neurodevelopmental Disorders, 15(1), 36. https://doi.org/10.1186/s11689-023-09505-w PubMed

• Davis, J., et al. (2016). Trajectories of autism symptom severity change during early childhood. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders. [PDF].

What Friendship Looks Like When You’re on the Autism Spectrum

Table of Contents

Intro

Understanding the Spectrum Beyond the Stereotypes

The Challenge and Beauty of Friendships on the Spectrum

Life Lessons from the Spectrum

Empowerment through Storytelling

What We Can All Learn, Even If We’re Not on the Spectrum

Conclusion

What Friendship Looks Like When You’re on the Autism Spectrum

In this episode of On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories, host Sonia Krishna Chand sits down with Marccella Gonzalez for a real and open chat. Both women are on the autism spectrum, and they talk about what friendship, life lessons, and personal growth look like for them.

This is not a formal or clinical discussion. It feels more like two friends sharing what life is really like, the good and the hard parts. They laugh, reflect, and remind listeners that it’s okay to be different.

The conversation shows how powerful it is when people share their stories. It helps others feel seen and understood.

So what happens when two autistic women sit down to talk about friendship and growth? You get honesty, laughter, and lessons that anyone can learn from, whether they are neurodivergent or not.

Understanding the Spectrum Beyond the Stereotypes

When people hear the word autism, many still imagine only one kind of person or behavior. But the truth is, autism looks different for everyone. Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) simply means a different way of seeing, feeling, and interacting with the world. It is not an illness that needs to be cured. It is not something broken. It is a part of how a person’s brain works and how they experience life.

In the podcast, Sonia Krishna Chand and Marccella Gonzalez talk about this with honesty and warmth. They both believe that autism is part of who they are, not something to fix or hide. Instead of seeing it as a weakness, they see it as a part of their identity that brings both challenges and strengths. For example, someone on the spectrum might notice details others miss, feel emotions deeply, or have a strong sense of honesty and creativity. These are qualities to value and celebrate.

One important part of their discussion is something called masking. Masking happens when autistic people try to hide their true behaviors or feelings in order to fit into social situations. They might copy how others talk, laugh at the right times, or pretend to be comfortable when they are actually overwhelmed. While masking can help them get through certain moments, it can also be exhausting. Over time, it can lead to anxiety, stress, and even burnout because it takes so much energy to pretend to be someone else.

Sonia and Marccella explain that learning to understand yourself is the first step toward peace and confidence. When you know what makes you comfortable, what triggers stress, and what brings you joy, you can live more freely. Self-understanding helps you build a life that fits who you are instead of forcing yourself into spaces that do not feel right.

Their conversation reminds listeners that autism is not about limits. It is about learning how your unique mind works and allowing yourself to live truthfully. Once that happens, acceptance becomes easier, and life begins to feel lighter and more authentic.

The Challenge and Beauty of Friendships on the Spectrum

Friendship can be a beautiful part of life, but for people on the autism spectrum, it often comes with its own set of challenges and lessons. In the podcast, Sonia and Marccella talk about how friendships are not always easy to form or maintain, yet they are deeply meaningful when they work. Their conversation paints a real and heartfelt picture of what friendship looks like through an autistic lens.

A. Making and Maintaining Friendships

For many autistic people, social expectations can be confusing or even draining. Things that seem simple to others, like knowing when to speak, how to respond to jokes, or when to hug someone, may not always come naturally. Sonia and Marccella explain that friendship for them is not something that just happens automatically. It requires effort, honesty, and mutual respect.

Here are a few reasons why forming and keeping friendships can feel challenging:

• Difficulty reading social cues: It can be hard to tell when someone is joking, serious, or upset.

• Misunderstandings: A straightforward comment might be taken the wrong way, or silence might be seen as disinterest when it’s actually just comfort in quietness.

• Need for alone time: Social interactions can take a lot of energy, so many autistic people need time to rest and recharge afterward.

Despite these challenges, both women share that friendship can still be deeply fulfilling. When people communicate clearly and accept each other’s differences, friendships can grow stronger and more genuine.

B. When Friendships Change or Fade

Sometimes friendships drift apart, and that can be painful for anyone. But for someone on the spectrum, it can feel especially confusing or heavy. Sonia and Marccella talk about how easy it is to blame yourself when a friendship ends. You might replay conversations in your mind, wondering what you did wrong.

They remind listeners that part of growing up is learning to let go of guilt. Friendships change for many reasons, and it is not always anyone’s fault. Instead of feeling ashamed or defeated, they encourage focusing on boundaries and self-care. It is okay to recognize when a friendship no longer feels healthy or when you need space. Learning without guilt means understanding that taking care of yourself is not selfish.

C. Finding Safe and Supportive Connections

One of the most powerful points in the conversation is about finding community. Sonia and Marccella describe how connecting with other autistic people feels freeing. There is comfort in being around people who understand your experiences without you having to explain or hide parts of yourself.

They talk about how shared stories can heal and bring people together. When one person speaks openly about their challenges or joys, it gives others the courage to do the same. As Sonia beautifully says, “When we share our stories, we realize we’re not alone.”

Friendship, in the end, is not about fitting into a mold. It is about finding people who make you feel seen, respected, and accepted just as you are. For autistic individuals, these friendships might take time to build, but they are often some of the most genuine and lasting ones of all.

The conversation between Sonia and Marccella is full of wisdom and gentle reminders about what it means to truly know and accept yourself. Through their personal stories, they share lessons that go beyond autism. These are lessons about self-acceptance, balance, and living life in a way that feels right for you.

Life Lessons from the Spectrum

The conversation between Sonia and Marccella is full of wisdom and gentle reminders about what it means to truly know and accept yourself. Through their personal stories, they share lessons that go beyond autism. These are lessons about self-acceptance, balance, and living life in a way that feels right for you.

A. Self-Acceptance Is a Process

Sonia and Marccella both remind listeners that self-acceptance does not happen in one day. It is a process that takes time, patience, and a lot of self-discovery. They explain that understanding your personal triggers, needs, and strengths is the first step. Once you begin to see what works for you and what doesn’t, life becomes a little easier to manage.

For example, you might realize that certain environments make you anxious or that too much noise overwhelms you. Knowing these things helps you make choices that protect your peace. Both women also talk about celebrating small wins, like getting through a social event comfortably or finding a new coping tool that helps.

They also discuss unmasking, which means slowly learning to stop hiding your true self to please others. Unmasking safely means choosing environments and people who make you feel safe to be yourself. This kind of acceptance grows over time, but every small step counts.

B. Coping Strategies that Work

Throughout the episode, Sonia and Marccella share practical ways to handle everyday challenges. They don’t claim to have all the answers, but their advice comes from real experience. Here are some of the coping strategies they talk about or imply:

1. Build routines that respect your sensory needs: Having structure helps reduce anxiety. This could mean planning quiet time after work, avoiding bright or noisy spaces, or keeping familiar items that bring comfort.

2. Communicate boundaries clearly: Let friends and family know what makes you comfortable and what doesn’t. Being honest about your needs can help prevent misunderstandings and build stronger, more respectful relationships.

3. Give yourself permission to rest: It is perfectly okay to say no to social events or take breaks when you need them. Resting is not laziness. It is a form of self-care that helps you stay balanced and emotionally healthy.

These small but powerful strategies show that managing life on the spectrum is about creating habits that support who you are, not forcing yourself to live like everyone else.

C. Redefining “Normal”

One of the most inspiring messages in their discussion is the idea of redefining what “normal” means. Sonia and Marccella remind us that there is no single way to live or make friends. Everyone’s version of happiness and success looks different.

For them, thriving does not mean fitting in or following what society expects. It means living a life that feels true, peaceful, and fulfilling. It means having friendships that accept differences, routines that bring comfort, and goals that reflect your personal journey.

Their message is clear: being different does not make you less. It just means your path looks unique, and that is something to be proud of.

Empowerment through Storytelling

One of the most powerful parts of Sonia and Marccella’s conversation is how their stories create space for others to be seen and understood. When people on the autism spectrum share their experiences, they do more than tell personal stories. They help others learn, feel less alone, and challenge the stereotypes that have existed for too long.

For a long time, autistic voices, especially those of women, have not been heard enough. Many women on the spectrum are underdiagnosed or misunderstood, often because their symptoms look different from what people expect. Some learn to “mask” so well that others don’t realize how hard they are working just to fit in. By speaking openly, Sonia and Marccella give those silent experiences a voice. They show that autism has many faces, and each one deserves to be recognized and respected.

Their conversation also highlights the importance of visibility and representation. When more autistic people, particularly women, share their stories, it helps change how society understands autism. It teaches both neurodivergent and neurotypical communities that there is no single way to be “normal.” Everyone has a unique story, and every story matters.

Being open about personal struggles and growth builds empathy. It allows others to listen without judgment and encourages honesty about things that are often kept hidden. Sonia and Marccella’s openness helps others feel safe to be themselves, too. When people hear stories that reflect their own experiences, it can bring relief, hope, and confidence.

Their message is simple but strong: every time someone tells their story, they make it easier for the next person to do the same. As Sonia beautifully puts it,
“When you tell your story, you’re not just helping yourself. You’re lighting the path for someone else.”

What We Can All Learn, Even If We’re Not on the Spectrum

Even if you are not on the autism spectrum, there is so much to learn from Sonia and Marccella’s conversation. Their stories are not only about autism but about being human — learning, growing, and trying to connect with others in an honest way. The lessons they share can help anyone build better, kinder relationships.

Here are some of the universal lessons from their talk:

1. Be patient with differences

Everyone experiences the world differently. Some people may take longer to respond, need more space, or communicate in a way that feels unfamiliar. Instead of rushing to judge or correct, practice patience. Give people time to express themselves. You never know what they might be dealing with inside.

2. Listen more than you assume

Sometimes we think we know what someone is feeling or trying to say, but we don’t always get it right. Sonia and Marccella remind us that listening with an open heart matters more than assuming we already understand. Ask questions, pay attention, and be willing to learn from others’ experiences.

3. Friendship isn’t about sameness; it’s about respect and understanding

The strongest friendships are not built on being exactly alike. They grow when people accept and appreciate each other’s differences. Real connection happens when we respect boundaries, honor feelings, and show up with kindness.

Their stories encourage us to see friendship and human connection in a new light. Every person you meet has a unique way of thinking, feeling, and expressing love. When you approach relationships with empathy and curiosity, you open the door to deeper understanding.

Whether or not you are on the spectrum, we can all try to make the world a gentler place — one where people feel safe to be themselves and where friendship is built on care, not perfection.

Conclusion

Sonia and Marccella’s conversation is a beautiful reminder of what courage looks like. It takes strength to speak openly about personal experiences, especially in a world that often misunderstands what it means to live on the autism spectrum. By sharing their stories, they give hope and confidence to others who may be walking a similar path.

Their honesty shows that autism is not a limitation. It is simply a different way of seeing and experiencing the world. Through their words, we learn that friendship, self-acceptance, and growth look different for everyone, and that is perfectly okay. Their stories prove that every person, no matter how they think or feel, has something valuable to bring into the world.

At its heart, this conversation is not just about autism. It is about what it means to be human, learning, connecting, and embracing who we truly are.

If you enjoyed this reflection and want to hear the full conversation, listen to the podcast episode “Just Two Girls Discussing Autism Spectrum Disorder, Friendships, and Navigating Life Lessons” on On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories with Sonia Krishna Chand.

How Depression Can take Over the Autistic Mind

Table of Contents

Intro

The Overlap Between Autism and Depression

When Depression Amplifies Autistic Challenges

Breaking the Mental Loop: Getting Out of Your Own Head

The Power of Environment and Support

From Surviving to Thriving: Reclaiming Strengths

Conclusion

How Depression Can take Over the Autistic Mind

Have you ever felt trapped inside your own mind, unable to switch off the negative thoughts—no matter how hard you try? For many autistic individuals, that feeling isn’t just occasional or fleeting. It’s a daily battle that can reshape how they see themselves, interact with others, and navigate the world. Depression, in this context, isn’t simply about sadness or low mood—it’s a force that can quietly take over the mind, amplifying the unique challenges that come with being autistic.

In a recent episode of On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories, host Sonia Krishna Chand dives deep into this very topic: “Depression and the Power It Has Over the Autistic Mind.” The episode sheds light on how depression intertwines with autism, often in ways that go unseen or misunderstood by others. It’s not just about identifying symptoms, it’s about understanding the emotional weight carried by those who live with both.

The Overlap Between Autism and Depression

When we talk about depression, most people imagine sadness, tears, or a lack of motivation. But for autistic individuals, depression can look very different. It doesn’t always follow the same patterns that most mental health professionals or even loved ones expect. This is part of what makes it so complex and so often misunderstood.

In the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories episode, Sonia Krishna Chand explains that the relationship between autism and depression is not just a coincidence. One can actually intensify the other. When the mind is already processing the world in a unique, heightened way, depression can amplify that sensitivity, making everyday experiences even more overwhelming.

For example, a common sign of depression is social withdrawal, avoiding people or activities that once brought joy. But many autistic individuals naturally need solitude or downtime after social interactions. So when someone on the spectrum starts isolating more than usual, it can be hard to tell if it’s part of their neurodivergent rhythm or a sign of something deeper. This overlap can make diagnosis and support more challenging.

Another common symptom is loss of motivation. In depression, this often shows up as difficulty starting tasks or maintaining interest. For an autistic person, this might blend with the challenges of executive functioning or sensory overload. What looks like “laziness” or “disinterest” may actually be a combination of burnout and depression working together.

Sonia also touches on the emotional cost of masking—the effort autistic people put into hiding their natural behaviors to fit social expectations. This constant performance can drain emotional energy and create feelings of invisibility or inadequacy. Over time, that emotional strain can deepen depression. When someone feels they have to pretend to be “normal” just to be accepted, it’s easy for hopelessness to creep in.

As Sonia shares in the episode, “Depression doesn’t just sit beside autism. It seeps into it, shaping how the autistic mind feels, thinks, and sees the world.”

This reflection reminds us that depression isn’t a separate visitor in the autistic experience—it often becomes intertwined with it. Recognizing this overlap is the first step toward offering the right kind of help. It’s not about treating autism or depression in isolation, but about understanding how they interact and how one can magnify the other.

When Depression Amplifies Autistic Challenges

For many autistic individuals, daily life already comes with unique challenges—managing sensory input, navigating social situations, and communicating in ways others understand. When depression enters the picture, those challenges can feel magnified. What might be a mild irritation on a good day can become completely overwhelming during a depressive episode.

Sensory overload is one of the first areas where this becomes obvious. Imagine living in a world where sounds, lights, or textures that others barely notice feel like they’re turned up to maximum volume. Depression lowers emotional resilience, making these sensory triggers harder to tolerate. A noisy room that was once manageable might suddenly feel unbearable. The constant flood of sensations can leave someone feeling trapped, overstimulated, and powerless to find calm.

Communication can also become more difficult. Depression often dulls energy and motivation, making it harder to express thoughts or feelings clearly. For autistic individuals—many of whom already work hard to be understood—this can lead to even more frustration. They might retreat further, feeling like their words don’t matter or that no one truly gets them. This isolation can deepen the sense of being disconnected from the world.

Then there’s the weight of social rejection. Many autistic people grow up feeling different or misunderstood, and those experiences can linger. When depression strikes, those old wounds reopen. Negative thoughts like “I’ll never fit in” or “I’m too much for people” can loop endlessly, feeding a dangerous cycle of guilt and self-criticism. Sonia Krishna Chand describes this as being caught in your own head—constantly replaying the same painful thoughts until they feel like truth.

Healing begins with awareness. When someone understands how depression distorts their thoughts and heightens autistic struggles, they can start to take small, intentional steps toward balance. But awareness alone isn’t enough. Many environments—homes, schools, workplaces—are not designed with neurodivergent needs in mind. The effort to function in spaces that constantly demand masking or overstimulation leads to emotional exhaustion. Over time, this can make depression feel almost impossible to escape.

That’s why conversations like this one matter. They remind us that supporting autistic individuals through depression requires more than advice—it requires rethinking how we listen, communicate, and create safe spaces for healing.

Tune in to On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories and listen to the full episode, “Depression and the Power It Has Over the Autistic Mind

Breaking the Mental Loop: Getting Out of Your Own Head

For autistic individuals dealing with depression, the mind can become a noisy, exhausting place—filled with overthinking, self-blame, and replayed moments of failure. This constant mental loop can drain energy and make recovery feel impossible. But it doesn’t have to stay that way.

The first step to breaking the loop is learning how to get out of your own head—not by ignoring your thoughts, but by understanding and gently redirecting them. Sonia emphasizes that this takes time and self-awareness, not force. Here are a few practical ways to start:

1. Practice mindfulness or sensory grounding

Mindfulness doesn’t have to mean long meditations or sitting in silence. For autistic individuals, grounding techniques can be more effective. Try focusing on physical sensations that feel safe—like the weight of a blanket, a calming texture, or steady breathing. These sensory anchors help pull the mind back to the present moment when thoughts begin to spiral.

1. Build predictable routines

Depression thrives in chaos. Establishing small, predictable routines can create a sense of control and stability. Simple actions—like setting a morning ritual, scheduling rest breaks, or having a go-to playlist for difficult days—reduce anxiety and decision fatigue. Predictability can be a lifeline when emotions feel unpredictable.

1. Use special interests as emotional anchors

One of the beautiful aspects of the autistic mind is its ability to dive deeply into specific passions. During depressive episodes, these interests can serve as pathways back to joy and purpose. Whether it’s art, coding, reading, or collecting, giving yourself permission to engage with what you love is not “avoiding” life—it’s reconnecting with it.

1. Seek neurodiversity-affirming therapy

Finding a therapist who understands both autism and depression can make all the difference. A neurodiversity-affirming approach doesn’t try to “fix” autism; instead, it focuses on managing depression while embracing your autistic identity. Therapy should feel like a collaboration, not a correction.

Ultimately, the goal isn’t to fight your brain, but to work with it. Sonia reminds listeners that every brain has its own rhythm and limits, and healing begins when you stop judging yourself for how yours works. It’s about noticing patterns, showing compassion to yourself, and building tools that 

The Power of Environment and Support

Healing from depression is never a solo journey, especially for autistic individuals. The spaces we live in, the people we interact with, and the energy that surrounds us can either support recovery or quietly work against it. Environment plays a major role in how the autistic mind experiences depression and how quickly someone can begin to heal.

For autistic individuals, the environment is not just background noise—it shapes daily functioning. A cluttered, loud, or unpredictable setting can heighten sensory overload and deepen feelings of distress. On the other hand, a calm and predictable environment can bring a sense of control and comfort. Simple changes, like adjusting lighting, using noise-canceling headphones, or creating a dedicated quiet space, can make a world of difference. These are not luxuries; they are necessities for mental wellbeing.

Equally important are the people in that environment. Supportive relationships can act as emotional anchors, while misunderstanding or judgment can push someone further into isolation. Depression often makes it hard to reach out for help, so having friends or family who offer gentle, consistent support can be life-changing. Sometimes, it’s not about giving advice—it’s about listening without pressure, validating feelings, and creating safety through understanding.

This same principle applies to educators, therapists, and clinicians. True support for autistic individuals means moving beyond pity and toward empathy. Pity can feel condescending, as if something is wrong with the person. Empathy, on the other hand, communicates respect and partnership. When professionals acknowledge the person’s strengths, sensory needs, and communication style, they create space for genuine healing.

Sonia Krishna Chand reminds listeners that support must fit the individual, not the other way around. Environments built without considering neurodivergent needs can unintentionally contribute to burnout and depression. But when those environments are adjusted with care—through flexible routines, sensory-safe spaces, and patient communication—they become foundations for growth.

Take a moment to reflect on your own surroundings.

• Do your daily spaces help you feel calm and grounded, or do they drain your energy?

• Are the people around you understanding of your needs, or do you often feel the need to mask who you are?

• What small change could you make today to feel a bit safer, calmer, or more supported?

These questions are not just for autistic individuals, they’re for anyone who wants to build environments that promote better mental health. Because healing doesn’t happen in isolation. It happens in spaces that feel safe enough to let you breathe.

From Surviving to Thriving: Reclaiming Strengths

Depression has a way of making even the brightest parts of ourselves feel distant. For many autistic individuals, it can silence their natural strengths—turning confidence into doubt and creativity into exhaustion. But as Sonia Krishna Chand reminds us in her podcast, those strengths never disappear. They’re still there, waiting to be rediscovered once the fog of depression begins to lift.

Autistic individuals often have remarkable abilities: deep focus, creativity, empathy, and an incredible attention to detail. These traits can sometimes feel like burdens in a world that doesn’t understand them, but they’re actually powerful tools for healing and growth. When nurtured and accepted, they can transform survival into thriving.

Take focus, for example. What might seem like hyperfixation to others can become a source of calm and mastery when used intentionally. Diving into a special interest—whether it’s art, science, writing, or technology—can help channel energy away from despair and toward something meaningful. That focus can bring a sense of purpose back into days that feel heavy.

Then there’s creativity. Many autistic individuals have a unique way of seeing patterns, colors, and connections that others miss. Depression can dull this spark, but expressing creativity through art, music, journaling, or design can reignite it. Creative expression allows emotions to flow in safe ways, turning pain into something that communicates and heals.

And let’s not forget empathy. While society often assumes autistic people lack empathy, the truth is many feel emotions deeply—sometimes too deeply. This sensitivity can make them compassionate listeners and caring friends. When guided in healthy ways, that emotional depth becomes a strength that fosters understanding and connection.

Sonia highlights that thriving begins with self-acceptance. It’s not about trying to “fix” autism or suppress who you are. It’s about realizing that autism is not the problem—lack of understanding is. Depression can make you feel broken or unworthy, but the real issue often lies in how the world responds to difference. When environments, systems, and relationships evolve to support neurodivergent minds, autistic individuals can flourish exactly as they are.

Thriving doesn’t mean pretending depression never existed. It means learning from it, growing through it, and reclaiming the parts of yourself that felt lost. Every moment of curiosity, every creative spark, and every quiet act of resilience is proof that strength never truly fades—it only waits for the right space to shine.

Listen to On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories with Sonia Krishna Chand, featuring the episode “Depression and the Power It Has Over the Autistic Mind.”

Conclusion

Depression has a way of distorting how we see ourselves and the world around us. For autistic individuals, that distortion can be even more intense—magnifying challenges, clouding strengths, and creating a constant inner battle. But as Sonia Krishna Chand reminds us in her conversation on On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories, healing is not only possible; it’s within reach when understanding and compassion lead the way.

Awareness is the first step. When we begin to recognize how depression affects the autistic mind, we can start offering the right kind of support—support that values the individual rather than trying to change them. The goal isn’t to erase autism or mask differences but to create space for autistic people to feel seen, heard, and accepted as they are.

Listen to “Depression and the Power It Has Over the Autistic Mind” On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories with Sonia Krishna Chand.

Breaking the Stigma of ABA

Table of Contents

Intro

Understanding the Stigma Around ABA

Reframing ABA: From Control to Collaboration

The Power of Lived Experience in Practice

What Ethical ABA Looks Like

Bridging the Gap: Practitioners and the Neurodivergent Community

Practical Takeaways for Parents, Practitioners, and Neurodivergent Individuals

Why This Conversation Matters

Conclusion

Breaking the Stigma of ABA

If you’ve ever heard about Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), you probably know it’s a type of therapy often used to support people on the autism spectrum. In simple terms, ABA focuses on understanding behaviors—why they happen—and finding ways to teach helpful skills or replace harmful habits.

But here’s the thing: ABA isn’t without controversy. Some families say it’s changed their lives for the better, helping their children communicate, build confidence, and thrive. Others, especially many autistic adults, share painful experiences from older methods of ABA that felt too rigid or focused more on “fixing” them instead of supporting who they truly are.

That’s why it’s time to have a fresh, honest conversation about what ABA really is and what it can be when done with respect and compassion.

Understanding the Stigma Around ABA

To understand why so many people have mixed feelings about ABA, it helps to look at where it all began. When ABA first became popular, it was often used in a way that focused mainly on compliance. The goal was to get autistic children to act more “typical” by rewarding certain behaviors and discouraging others.

While this approach sometimes produced quick results, it also came at a cost. Many people who went through early ABA describe feeling like they were being trained rather than supported. They were praised for making eye contact or sitting still, but not always for expressing their true feelings or being themselves. Over time, this created lasting emotional pain for some.

Today, a lot of neurodivergent adults who experienced those older methods are speaking up. They talk about how ABA made them feel like who they were was wrong or something that needed to be fixed. For many, that experience left deep scars and has shaped how they view the therapy even now.

It’s important to listen to these stories and take them seriously. Acknowledging this pain is not about blaming anyone. It’s about understanding what went wrong so the same mistakes aren’t repeated. Only when we truly recognize and validate those experiences can trust be rebuilt between the autism community and the professionals who want to help.

In the episode, Britney and Ashton talk candidly about how ABA’s past shaped today’s stigma. Hear their personal take here.

Reframing ABA: From Control to Collaboration

One of the biggest messages Britney and Ashton shared in the podcast is that ABA needs to move away from control and toward collaboration. In the past, many ABA programs were built around strict rules and compliance. The therapist decided what behaviors were “good” or “bad,” and the goal was to shape the person to fit into what society considered “normal.”

But the modern approach they describe is completely different. Instead of trying to control how someone behaves, it focuses on working with the person to understand their needs, motivations, and feelings. Collaboration and consent are at the center of this new way of thinking.

Britney and Ashton explain that true progress happens when the person receiving support feels seen and respected. It means giving them a voice in their own therapy and allowing them to make choices about what they want to work on. For example, rather than focusing on reducing “hand flapping” or “avoiding stimming,” a therapist might ask, “What helps you feel calm when you’re overwhelmed?” or “Would you like to find other ways to express that feeling?” This simple shift transforms therapy from being about control to being about empowerment.

They also highlight the importance of person-centered goals. Every individual is unique, and so are their challenges and strengths. ABA should focus on skills that truly improve quality of life, like learning how to communicate needs clearly, manage emotions, build social confidence, or handle daily routines more independently. When goals are meaningful and relevant, therapy feels supportive rather than restrictive.

Another key point they emphasize is transparency. Families and clients should always know what is being done, why it is being done, and how progress is measured. Open communication builds trust and helps everyone feel like part of the same team.

As Britney and Ashton put it in the podcast, “ABA should be about supporting someone’s quality of life, not forcing them to fit a mold.” Their message is clear: when ABA is built on respect, consent, and collaboration, it becomes more than therapy—it becomes a partnership that helps people thrive.

The Power of Lived Experience in Practice

One of the most powerful things about the conversation in Breaking the Stigma of ABA is that both guests, Britney Smith and Ashton Benedikt, bring something very special to the table—lived experience. Britney has ADHD, and Ashton is autistic. This means they don’t just understand ABA from textbooks or training manuals; they understand it from the inside out. They know what it feels like to be neurodivergent, to see the world differently, and to sometimes struggle in environments that aren’t built for that difference.

Their personal experiences give them a unique kind of empathy that can’t be taught in a classroom. When Britney works with someone who finds it hard to focus, she knows firsthand how it feels when your brain moves faster than your surroundings. When Ashton supports an autistic child who’s struggling with sensory overload, he understands what it’s like when certain sounds or lights become too much. This shared understanding helps them connect on a deeper level with their clients and build trust more easily.

They also help bridge an important gap that often exists between practitioners and the neurodivergent community. In the past, many therapies were developed and led by people who weren’t neurodivergent themselves. This sometimes created a disconnect, because the therapy might have been based on assumptions rather than real experiences. Britney and Ashton are helping to change that. Their voices show that neurodivergent professionals can shape the field from the inside, making it more respectful, informed, and compassionate.

They believe that neurodivergent voices are essential in shaping ethical ABA. When people who have actually lived through these challenges help design and deliver therapy, the approach becomes more authentic. It becomes less about “fixing” someone and more about supporting them to live comfortably and confidently as who they are.

Their stories remind us that ABA doesn’t have to be one-sided. It can be a shared journey, built on mutual understanding and respect.

What Ethical ABA Looks Like

When Britney and Ashton talk about ethical ABA, they’re not just talking about following rules or meeting professional standards. They’re talking about creating a kind of therapy that honors the person’s humanity, individuality, and freedom to make choices. To them, ethics in ABA means treating the person not as a project to be “fixed,” but as a whole human being who deserves respect and understanding.

A big part of ethical practice is respecting autonomy and self-determination. This means giving people the power to make choices about their own therapy. For example, a therapist might ask, “What do you want to work on?” or “Does this goal feel helpful to you?” Instead of forcing progress that feels uncomfortable, they work together to set goals that actually matter to the person.

Another key part of ethical ABA is checking in regularly about how things are going. Britney and Ashton stress that therapy shouldn’t be something that’s just done to someone. It should be done with them. This means regularly asking for feedback: “Do you like how this is going?” “Is there something you want to change?” These small conversations build trust and make sure the person feels heard throughout the process.

They also point out the importance of avoiding masking. Masking happens when a neurodivergent person tries to hide their natural behaviors to appear more “normal.” While this might make them fit in better for a moment, it often leads to burnout, anxiety, and low self-esteem in the long run. Ethical ABA supports people in understanding and managing their behaviors in ways that feel authentic, rather than teaching them to hide who they are.

Finally, Britney and Ashton emphasize that success should be measured by comfort, growth, and happiness, not just compliance. Progress isn’t only about reducing behaviors or meeting targets, it’s about helping someone feel more capable, confident, and understood.

Bridging the Gap: Practitioners and the Neurodivergent Community

One of the challenges in ABA today is that many providers are not neurodivergent themselves. While they may be highly trained and well-intentioned, this difference in perspective can sometimes create a trust gap between the therapist and the person receiving support. People may feel misunderstood or that their experiences are overlooked, which can make therapy feel less effective or even stressful.

Britney and Ashton point out that bridging this gap requires open dialogue and the active inclusion of neurodivergent perspectives. Therapy works best when it is a true partnership, where the voices of those receiving support are valued just as much as the professional knowledge of the therapist. This means listening closely, asking questions, and making space for neurodivergent people to share their experiences and preferences.

Clinics and families can take practical steps to create these partnerships. For example, therapists can hold regular check-ins not only with parents but also directly with the person receiving ABA to ask how things are going. Families can encourage their loved ones to speak up about what is and isn’t working for them. Together, this helps everyone feel included in goal-setting and decision-making.

It also helps to involve neurodivergent professionals in staff training or program development. Their insight can shape therapy approaches that are more ethical, effective, and compassionate. The result is a therapy environment built on mutual respect and understanding, rather than a one-sided process where the provider dictates everything.

By creating these bridges, ABA can evolve into a practice that genuinely supports the person’s needs and celebrates their individuality. When therapists and clients work together, guided by empathy and shared decision-making, trust grows, outcomes improve, and therapy becomes a truly empowering experience.

Want to hear how Britney and Ashton are building that bridge in real life? Listen to their full conversation here.

Practical Takeaways for Parents, Practitioners, and Neurodivergent Individuals

After listening to Britney and Ashton’s discussion in the podcast, it’s clear that ABA works best when everyone involved feels seen, respected, and included. Here are some practical takeaways for different groups to help make therapy more effective and empowering.

For Parents

Parents play a crucial role in supporting their child’s ABA journey. Instead of simply following a plan, you can be an active partner by asking the right questions and advocating for your child’s voice.

• Ask how goals are chosen: Are they based on your child’s interests, needs, and comfort, or only on compliance?

• Include your child’s perspective: Encourage your child to share their feelings about the therapy and what they want to work on.

• Check in regularly: Ask for updates on progress and discuss whether the goals still feel relevant and meaningful.

• Observe the environment: Notice if your child seems stressed, anxious, or genuinely enjoying sessions. Comfort matters as much as skill-building.

For Practitioners

ABA practitioners can make therapy more effective and ethical by staying flexible and including neurodivergent input.

• Invite feedback: Ask clients and families how the therapy is working for them. Adjust plans based on their responses.

• Focus on meaningful progress: Measure success by improvements in independence, confidence, and quality of life—not just task completion.

• Avoid one-size-fits-all approaches: Tailor goals and interventions to each person’s needs, strengths, and preferences.

• Continue learning: Stay informed about neurodiversity, ethical practices, and evolving strategies that respect autonomy and individuality.

For Neurodivergent Individuals

If you are receiving ABA therapy, it is your right to have a voice and participate in decisions about your care.

• Speak up: Share your preferences, needs, and concerns with your therapist. Your input matters.

• Choose providers carefully: Look for therapists who treat you as a partner and respect your individuality, rather than someone they are trying to change.

• Know your goals: Make sure the therapy supports what you want to achieve in daily life, comfort, and self-expression.

• Ask for clarity: Understand what each exercise or session is meant to accomplish and how it benefits you.

By following these practical steps, therapy can become more collaborative, respectful, and truly supportive of the person’s growth. ABA works best when it is a partnership built on communication, trust, and shared goals.

For more tips and insights directly from Britney and Ashton, listen to the full episode here.

Why This Conversation Matters

It is important to remember that ABA is not inherently bad. The therapy itself is a tool that can help people learn skills, communicate better, and live more independently. The problems arise when ABA is applied in ways that do not respect the person receiving it. That is why conversations like the one Britney and Ashton had in the podcast are so important. They help us understand how ABA can evolve to be more ethical, supportive, and person-centered.

This conversation also connects to a bigger movement: neurodiversity-affirming care. In simple terms, neurodiversity-affirming care means recognizing that differences in how people think, learn, and experience the world are not flaws to fix, but part of human diversity. Supporting someone in a way that respects who they are is not just about therapy—it is about social change. It challenges old ideas that people must conform to a standard and promotes acceptance, understanding, and inclusion.

Britney and Ashton make it clear that real progress happens when therapy supports individuality, autonomy, and respect. It is not just about reducing behaviors or meeting goals. It is about helping people grow in ways that matter to them, feel confident in their own skin, and develop skills that improve their daily lives. Therapy should empower the person, not control them.

By listening to their insights, parents, practitioners, and neurodivergent individuals can all learn how to make ABA better. It is about shifting the focus from control to collaboration, from compliance to respect, and from fitting in to thriving as oneself.

To hear more about why this conversation is so important and how ABA can change for the better, listen to the full episode here.

Conclusion: Let’s Keep the Conversation Going

ABA therapy has often been misunderstood. As Britney and Ashton explain in the podcast, it can be empowering when done ethically, collaboratively, and respectfully. When therapy focuses on supporting individuality, listening to the person receiving care, and creating meaningful goals, it becomes a tool for growth, confidence, and independence rather than control.

This conversation matters because it reminds us that change is possible. By including neurodivergent voices, practicing transparency, and focusing on quality of life rather than compliance, ABA can evolve into a practice that truly respects and supports the people it aims to help.

If you want to understand more about what ethical, person-centered ABA looks like, and hear real-life stories from neurodivergent professionals, the podcast is the perfect place to start. 

Hear the full story and join the conversation on the podcast here.

What It Means to be Autistic: Mona’s Story

Table of Contents

Intro

Early Understanding: Embracing Her Unique Mind

Breaking Barriers in Education

Thriving in Her Career — From Student to Financial Analyst

Advocacy and Giving Back — Turning Experience into Empowerment

The Power of Positivity — Choosing Mindset Over Fear

Representation and Hope

Conclusion

What It Means to Be on the Autistic: Mona’s Story

For a long time, many people have thought of autism as something that limits what a person can do. But stories like Mona’s remind us that being on the spectrum can also be a strength. It can mean seeing the world in a unique way, thinking differently, and finding creative solutions that others might miss.

Mona Israel is one of those people who turned her diagnosis into a story of empowerment. Instead of letting autism define her, she decided to understand it, embrace it, and use it to her advantage. Her journey is one filled with courage, self-awareness, and purpose.

In this blog, we’ll explore how Mona learned to accept who she is and how that acceptance opened doors to success in school, work, and life. She found her voice as a financial analyst, tutor, and advocate for others on the spectrum. Through every step, she has shown that being different is not something to hide from—it’s something to celebrate.

Early Understanding: Embracing Her Unique Mind

From a young age, Mona noticed that she experienced the world a little differently from those around her. The way she processed sounds, emotions, and information didn’t always match what others expected. While some people might have seen that as strange or difficult, Mona was naturally curious about why she felt that way.

As she grew older and learned more about autism, things started to make sense. The pieces of her story began to fit together. She started to realize that her mind wasn’t “wrong” or “broken.” It was simply wired in a way that helped her see life through a special lens. She began to notice her strengths — her ability to focus deeply, her creativity, and her unique way of solving problems. What once made her feel out of place became the very thing that made her stand out.

Understanding her autism became a turning point. It helped her stop comparing herself to others and start appreciating her own rhythm. Instead of asking, “Why am I like this?” she began to ask, “How can I use this to grow?” That shift in thinking changed everything.

Self-awareness became Mona’s foundation for empowerment. The more she learned about how her brain worked, the more confident she became in navigating school, relationships, and life decisions. She realized that understanding herself was not just about labels or diagnosis — it was about recognizing her value and using her strengths intentionally.

The biggest lesson from this part of Mona’s journey is simple but powerful: when you understand how your mind works, you stop fighting yourself. You start seeing your differences as gifts that can help you grow, create, and connect in meaningful ways.

Breaking Barriers in Education

School was one of the biggest testing grounds for Mona. Like many students on the autism spectrum, she didn’t always fit into the traditional way of learning. Teachers and classmates often misunderstood her quiet nature or unique way of processing information. Some assumed she wasn’t paying attention, while others simply underestimated what she was capable of. Those moments were hard. They made her question herself at times, but they also sparked something inside her — a deep determination to prove that her differences did not define her limits.

Mona faced more than just academic challenges. There were social struggles too, moments when group work felt overwhelming or when the noise of a classroom made it hard to concentrate. Yet, through it all, she found her own rhythm. She learned how to advocate for herself, ask for support when needed, and create study habits that worked best for her learning style. Instead of trying to be like everyone else, she focused on being the best version of herself.

Her perseverance paid off. Mona graduated high school, a milestone that felt even more meaningful because of what it represented — not just grades on paper, but resilience, growth, and self-belief. Moving forward into higher education and professional training, she continued to challenge stereotypes. Each step became a reminder that success does not look the same for everyone.

Mona’s journey shows that education for autistic students is not about forcing them to fit into rigid systems. It is about creating spaces where they can thrive. Every student deserves to learn in an environment that recognizes their strengths and gives them the tools to shine.

When schools shift their focus from what students lack to what they bring to the table, amazing things happen. Mona’s story proves that with patience, understanding, and the right support, barriers can be broken and potential can bloom.

Thriving in Her Career — From Student to Financial Analyst

After years of learning to understand herself and embrace her strengths, Mona carried that same determination into her career. She chose a path that matched her natural abilities — becoming a financial analyst. It’s a job that requires focus, precision, and strong logical thinking, qualities that come naturally to many people on the autism spectrum.

For Mona, numbers made sense in a way that words sometimes didn’t. She found comfort in patterns, structure, and clear problem-solving. Where others might find spreadsheets and data overwhelming, Mona saw order and possibility. Her attention to detail helped her spot trends that others missed, and her love for routines made her incredibly reliable at work.

But what really makes Mona’s story inspiring is how she turned her personal journey into something that helps others. Outside her role as a financial analyst, she also works as a tutor for neurodivergent children. She helps kids who think and learn differently discover their own potential.

Here are a few ways Mona supports them:

1. Building Confidence: She reminds each child that being different is not something to hide, but something to celebrate.

2. Teaching Practical Strategies: Mona helps her students find learning methods that fit how their minds work — whether it’s using visuals, routines, or breaking big tasks into smaller steps.

3. Encouraging Self-Acceptance: She shares her own story to show that success doesn’t come from trying to fit in, but from using your unique strengths.

Through her tutoring, Mona sees herself in her students — the same curiosity, the same struggles, and the same potential waiting to bloom. She often says that helping others understand their minds has also helped her appreciate her own even more.

The big takeaway from Mona’s career journey is simple but powerful: success doesn’t mean changing who you are; it means using who you are to your advantage. Her story reminds us that when we stop trying to “fix” our differences and start using them as strengths, we open the door to true success and fulfillment.

Advocacy and Giving Back — Turning Experience into Empowerment

Mona’s journey didn’t stop at personal success. Once she found her confidence and voice, she decided to use it to make a difference. For her, advocacy isn’t just about raising awareness — it’s about helping others feel seen, understood, and valued for who they are.

Today, Mona is passionate about sharing her story publicly. She speaks at events, mentors other neurodivergent individuals, and uses social media to spread honest messages about autism. Through her openness, she’s helping to change the way people think about what it means to be autistic, especially when it comes to women.

Mona often points out that many women on the spectrum are misunderstood or go undiagnosed for years. They learn to mask their traits or overcompensate to fit in, which can be exhausting and isolating. By talking openly about her experiences, Mona is breaking that silence. She wants others to know that autism doesn’t have one face or one story — it’s a spectrum that looks different for everyone.

Beyond her advocacy talks, Mona has also found creative ways to share her message. She’s a content creator and podcaster, using digital platforms to reach people who might not have access to in-person support. Through her podcast, she talks about topics like mental health, neurodiversity, and self-acceptance. Her goal is to show that autism isn’t a barrier to success — it’s simply part of a unique life journey.

What makes Mona’s advocacy powerful is her authenticity. She doesn’t try to present a perfect version of life; instead, she’s honest about the ups and downs. She believes that storytelling can heal, inspire, and empower others to embrace their true selves.

In the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast episode, Mona talks about how sharing her story became a form of giving back. She remembers how lost she once felt before finding her community and hopes her words can be that light for someone else.

Her message is clear: empowerment comes from understanding yourself and helping others do the same. By turning her personal challenges into a platform for awareness and compassion, Mona is proving that advocacy isn’t just about speaking — it’s about connecting, educating, and reminding others that their differences are worth celebrating.

The Power of Positivity — Choosing Mindset Over Fear

One of the most inspiring parts of Mona’s story is her mindset. She truly believes that positivity and self-belief can change your life. For her, living with autism hasn’t been about avoiding fear or pretending everything is easy — it’s about learning how to face challenges with faith, confidence, and a hopeful attitude.

Mona often says that our thoughts shape our reality. When she was younger, she sometimes doubted herself or felt like she didn’t belong. There were moments when people underestimated her or questioned what she could do. But over time, she realized that letting fear or doubt control her only made things harder. Instead of focusing on what others thought, she started focusing on what she could do — and that shift changed everything.

She learned to silence that inner voice that said, “You’re not enough,” and replaced it with a stronger one that said, “You are capable. You are worthy. You can do this.” This wasn’t an overnight change; it took practice, patience, and a lot of self-reflection. But Mona discovered that positivity is a choice, one she could make every single day — especially on the tough ones.

Here are some simple but powerful lessons inspired by Mona’s outlook:

• Believe in yourself even when others don’t. You know your potential better than anyone else. Trust your abilities and keep showing up for yourself.

• Surround yourself with people who see your potential. The right people can lift you up, encourage you, and remind you of your worth when you forget it.

• Celebrate progress, not perfection. Growth isn’t about doing everything right — it’s about moving forward, even if it’s one small step at a time.

Mona’s story reminds us that positivity isn’t pretending everything is fine. It’s choosing hope over fear, even when things are uncertain. It’s looking at your challenges and saying, “I can still create something beautiful from this.”

Her message is simple but powerful: growth begins when you stop apologizing for who you are. When you accept yourself fully — the strengths, the quirks, the imperfections — you open the door to real confidence and peace.

Representation and Hope

Mona’s story is more than just her personal journey. It has become a source of hope and encouragement for many people, especially those on the autism spectrum who might feel unseen, misunderstood, or underestimated.

For a long time, society has painted a very narrow picture of what autism looks like. Many people imagine a certain type of personality or behavior, and that limited view leaves out so many others, especially women. Mona’s life challenges that picture. She shows that being autistic does not mean being limited. Instead, it can mean being focused, determined, and full of potential.

By sharing her story openly, Mona helps others see that there is no single way to be autistic. She represents what confidence, intelligence, and resilience look like through a different lens. When people hear about her work as a financial analyst, a tutor, and an advocate, they begin to understand that autism is not a barrier to success. It is simply one part of who someone is.

Representation matters because it allows others to see what is possible. For young women or girls on the spectrum, seeing someone like Mona succeed in professional spaces can be life-changing. It tells them, “You belong here too.” It shows them that their dreams are valid and achievable. When we see ourselves reflected in others’ stories, it gives us the courage to step forward and try.

Mona’s journey also helps break down stereotypes. Instead of viewing autism through a lens of limitation, her story encourages people to look at it through a lens of strength and potential. She teaches others that everyone’s brain works differently, and those differences can create new ways of thinking, solving problems, and making an impact.

In the podcast episode, Mona shares a simple but powerful truth: “You can do anything you set your heart and mind to.” Those words carry deep meaning. They remind listeners that no matter what challenges they face, their mindset, effort, and belief in themselves can open doors.

Mona’s courage to share her truth has ripple effects. It inspires families to see the strengths in their children. It gives hope to adults on the spectrum who are still finding their path. And it challenges the world to see neurodiversity not as something to “fix” but as something to celebrate.

Conclusion

Mona’s story is a beautiful reminder that being on the spectrum is not about limitation but about possibility. Her journey shows that life with autism can be filled with creativity, determination, and incredible strength. What makes her story so powerful is how she chose to see her uniqueness as something valuable, not something to hide.

Through her experiences in school, work, and advocacy, Mona proved that embracing who you are opens doors you never thought possible. She didn’t wait for the world to fully understand her before moving forward. Instead, she learned to understand herself first, and that self-awareness became her foundation for success.

If there’s one takeaway from her story, it’s this: You don’t have to change who you are to be successful. The key is to understand yourself, accept your strengths and challenges, and use them to make a difference.

Listen to “Mona’s Autism Journey” on the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories Podcast to hear Mona’s inspiring story in her own words.

Autism from a Sibling Perspective

Table of Contents

Intro

Childhood Reflections: Learning to See the World Differently

Childhood Reflections

The Pressure of Being the “Other” Sibling

Misunderstandings and Growing Together

From Protection to Empowerment

The Overlooked Sibling

Encouragement for Families

Conclusion

Autism from a Sibling Perspective

When most people talk about autism, the conversation usually centers around the person on the spectrum or their parents. But there’s another side of the story that often goes unnoticed — the experience of siblings. Their journey is filled with love, patience, and moments of quiet understanding, but it can also come with confusion, frustration, and a longing to be seen.

Growing up with a sibling who has autism teaches lessons that go far beyond what you’ll ever find in a book. It shapes how you see the world, how you love, and how you understand differences. For many siblings, it’s a mix of joy and challenge — learning how to communicate in new ways, celebrating every small victory, and finding strength in unexpected places.

On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, Lauren Erickson opens up about her life as the sister of someone with autism. She shares what it was like to grow up learning, adapting, and finding her place in a family where love took many forms. Her story is honest, heartfelt, and deeply relatable for anyone who’s ever walked beside a loved one with special needs.

Childhood Reflections: Learning to See the World Differently

Lauren’s childhood didn’t look like most of her friends’. While other kids might have had easy-going mornings or typical family outings, hers often required more planning, patience, and understanding. Her sibling’s autism shaped the rhythm of their home — from the sounds and routines to the way love was expressed.

As a young girl, Lauren didn’t fully understand what autism meant. She only knew that her brother or sister saw the world in a different way. At first, there was confusion. She noticed that her sibling didn’t always respond the way she expected, avoided eye contact, or got upset over things that seemed small to her. But instead of frustration turning into resentment, curiosity began to take over. She started asking questions, watching closely, and slowly learning what brought her sibling comfort or joy.

Daily life for Lauren’s family was filled with unique routines. Simple things like going to the store, eating at a restaurant, or attending a birthday party could be unpredictable. There were days when plans had to change suddenly or when public outings ended early. But over time, Lauren began to see that those adjustments weren’t inconveniences — they were acts of love. They were the family’s way of supporting her sibling’s needs and ensuring everyone felt safe and included.

Through these experiences, Lauren discovered a deeper meaning of love. It wasn’t about perfection or having picture-perfect family moments. It was about showing up, staying patient, and finding joy in the little things. Whether it was celebrating her sibling saying a new word, making it through a day without a meltdown, or simply sharing a quiet moment together, Lauren learned that success could look different — and that was okay.

One of the most beautiful lessons from her childhood was realizing that love doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s version of it. True love, she discovered, grows through patience, presence, and understanding.

In the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, Lauren shares touching memories of those early years — how she learned to celebrate every small victory and how her sibling’s unique way of seeing the world helped her grow into a more compassionate, open-hearted person. Through her eyes, we’re reminded that difference is not a barrier to love, but a bridge that deepens it.

Childhood Reflections

Lauren’s childhood didn’t look like most of her friends’. While other kids might have had easy-going mornings or typical family outings, hers often required more planning, patience, and understanding. Her sibling’s autism shaped the rhythm of their home — from the sounds and routines to the way love was expressed.

As a young girl, Lauren didn’t fully understand what autism meant. She only knew that her brother or sister saw the world in a different way. At first, there was confusion. She noticed that her sibling didn’t always respond the way she expected, avoided eye contact, or got upset over things that seemed small to her. But instead of frustration turning into resentment, curiosity began to take over. She started asking questions, watching closely, and slowly learning what brought her sibling comfort or joy.

Daily life for Lauren’s family was filled with unique routines. Simple things like going to the store, eating at a restaurant, or attending a birthday party could be unpredictable. There were days when plans had to change suddenly or when public outings ended early. But over time, Lauren began to see that those adjustments weren’t inconveniences — they were acts of love. They were the family’s way of supporting her sibling’s needs and ensuring everyone felt safe and included.

Through these experiences, Lauren discovered a deeper meaning of love. It wasn’t about perfection or having picture-perfect family moments. It was about showing up, staying patient, and finding joy in the little things. Whether it was celebrating her sibling saying a new word, making it through a day without a meltdown, or simply sharing a quiet moment together, Lauren learned that success could look different — and that was okay.

One of the most beautiful lessons from her childhood was realizing that love doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s version of it. True love, she discovered, grows through patience, presence, and understanding.

On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, Lauren shares touching memories of those early years — how she learned to celebrate every small victory and how her sibling’s unique way of seeing the world helped her grow into a more compassionate, open-hearted person. Through her eyes, we’re reminded that difference is not a barrier to love, but a bridge that deepens it.

The Pressure of Being the “Other” Sibling

One of the most honest parts of Lauren’s story is when she talks about what it’s like to be the “other” sibling — the one who doesn’t have autism. It’s something that’s rarely discussed, but it’s very real. Many siblings in her position quietly take on an invisible kind of pressure. They feel they have to be the strong one, the easy one, or even the “perfect” one, because their parents already have so much to manage.

Lauren admits she often tried to stay out of the way. She didn’t want to cause extra stress at home, so she learned to keep her feelings to herself. If she was sad or upset, she’d tell herself it wasn’t as important as what her sibling might be going through. Over time, that became a habit — smiling when she didn’t feel okay, holding things in, and trying to be the one who always had it together.

She also felt a quiet pressure to succeed. Somewhere deep down, she believed that if she did well in school, behaved perfectly, or made her parents proud, it would somehow balance things out. It wasn’t something anyone told her directly, it was just something she absorbed over time. Many siblings of children with disabilities feel that same unspoken weight, trying to make up for the challenges their brother or sister faces.

Another layer of pressure came from the need to be strong. Lauren thought she had to be the steady one, the helper, the one who didn’t complain. But inside, she sometimes wished someone would notice her struggles too.

Misunderstandings and Growing Together

Lauren shares that one of the biggest lessons she learned growing up with her sibling on the autism spectrum was how important — and sometimes tricky — communication can be. What seemed simple for most families, like asking how someone’s day went or sharing a joke, could sometimes turn into confusion or frustration at home. Her sibling processed the world differently, and that meant emotions and reactions didn’t always match what she expected.

There were moments when Lauren would say something with kindness, but her sibling might take it the wrong way. Or times when her sibling would shut down completely, and she couldn’t understand why. At first, it was confusing and sometimes even hurtful. She wanted to connect but didn’t always know how. Over time, she realized that her sibling wasn’t being distant — they were simply communicating in their own way.

Lauren started to slow down. Instead of assuming, she began to observe — the tone, the body language, the little signs that showed what her sibling was really feeling. She learned to pause before reacting, to listen more than she spoke, and to meet her sibling where they were, not where she expected them to be.

This shift changed everything. Once she stopped trying to “fix” communication and started learning how her sibling expressed emotions, their bond deepened. Simple things — like sitting quietly together, using humor that worked for both of them, or celebrating small breakthroughs — began to mean so much more.

Lauren says each misunderstanding became an opportunity to grow closer. The more she practiced patience, the more she understood that connection isn’t about perfect words — it’s about genuine effort and love.

The biggest lesson she learned? Understanding someone on the spectrum isn’t about changing them to fit your world. It’s about learning to see through their eyes, speak their language, and appreciate the beauty of connection that doesn’t need to look like everyone else’s.

It’s not always easy, but for Lauren, every challenge brought her closer to her sibling — and helped her see that love really can speak in more ways than one.

From Protection to Empowerment

As Lauren grew older, her role as a sister began to shift in unexpected ways. When she was younger, she often felt protective — always watching out for her sibling, stepping in to prevent misunderstandings, and making sure others treated them kindly. It came from a place of love and care, but over time, she realized that constant protection could also hold her sibling back from discovering their own strength.

Lauren admits that it wasn’t easy to find the balance. She wanted to make life easier for her sibling, especially when people didn’t understand autism or when situations felt overwhelming. But as the years went by, she began to see that protecting too much could send an unintended message — that her sibling needed to be sheltered rather than supported.

In the podcast, Lauren shares that true inclusion means something deeper than just keeping someone safe. It’s about believing in their potential, trusting them to make choices, and letting them experience the world — even if it includes mistakes or challenges. That realization changed how she approached their relationship.

She started focusing less on “helping” and more on “empowering.” Instead of stepping in right away, she’d ask, “Do you want me to help, or do you want to try first?” This small shift gave her sibling space to take ownership of their actions and build confidence. It also taught Lauren to let go of her own need to control every situation.

It wasn’t always smooth. There were moments when stepping back felt uncomfortable, times when she wanted to intervene but chose to wait. But she noticed something beautiful: her sibling began to thrive. They took on new challenges, communicated more clearly, and developed a stronger sense of independence.

Lauren realized that empowerment goes both ways. As her sibling grew in confidence, she did too. She learned that love doesn’t mean doing everything for someone, it means believing they are capable and cheering them on as they grow.

Her biggest takeaway? Sometimes the best way to protect someone is to believe in their strength, even when it’s hard to step back. That’s where true growth — for both siblings — really begins.

The Overlooked Sibling

One of the most powerful parts of Lauren’s story is her honesty about feeling invisible at times. Growing up with a sibling on the autism spectrum often meant that most of the family’s focus naturally went toward meeting that sibling’s needs. Therapies, appointments, and daily routines revolved around making sure her brother or sister was supported — and while Lauren understood why, it sometimes left her quietly wondering, “Do I matter as much?”

She shares that this isn’t about jealousy or resentment. It’s about wanting to be noticed too. Many siblings of children with autism love their brother or sister deeply, but they also experience moments when they feel overlooked. Parents are often stretched thin, trying to balance everything, and siblings like Lauren may choose to stay quiet to avoid adding to the stress.

Lauren remembers bottling up her own emotions — hiding when she felt sad, confused, or even proud — because she didn’t want to “be a problem.” Over time, though, she realized that silence doesn’t make things easier. It only creates distance. What she really needed was reassurance that her feelings mattered too.

This part of her story reminds families of something important: every child in the household deserves to feel seen and valued. When one child’s needs are more visible, it’s easy to unintentionally overlook the quiet strength of the other.

Encouragement for Families

Lauren’s story isn’t just a reflection of her own experience, it’s a gentle reminder for every family walking a similar path. Supporting a child on the autism spectrum takes patience, time, and energy, but it’s just as important to nurture the emotional world of their siblings.

For parents, Lauren’s advice is simple and heartfelt:

• Listen without judgment: Sometimes siblings just need to talk — not for you to fix things, but simply to be heard. Acknowledging their emotions, whether it’s frustration, pride, or confusion, helps them feel validated.

• Give siblings emotional space: Every child needs a little room to process life in their own way. Encourage activities, friendships, or hobbies that belong just to them.

• Encourage open conversations about differences: When families talk openly about autism, it removes confusion and replaces it with understanding. It also helps siblings learn empathy and acceptance naturally.

And for siblings who might be reading this:

Your feelings matter: It’s okay to feel a mix of emotions — love, frustration, pride, and even sadness. You’re human, and that’s part of growing.

• It’s okay to ask for help: Talking to someone — a parent, teacher, or counselor — doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you care enough to take care of yourself too.

• You are part of the story too: Your role in your sibling’s journey is important, but so is your own journey. You have your own dreams, strengths, and purpose that deserve attention and celebration.

Conclusion

Lauren’s journey reminds us that growing up alongside a sibling with autism is a story of transformation. It’s not always easy, and it’s rarely picture-perfect, but it’s filled with moments that teach patience, empathy, and unconditional love. Through her experiences, Lauren learned that love doesn’t have to look the same for everyone — it grows stronger when we learn to understand and appreciate differences.

Her story also highlights something many families can relate to: the importance of communication and grace. There will be days filled with joy and laughter, and there will be others marked by confusion or exhaustion. But even when things feel hard, love continues to grow when families choose to stay connected, listen deeply, and celebrate each other’s progress, no matter how small.

For anyone walking a similar path, remember — it’s okay not to have all the answers. What matters most is showing up with an open heart and a willingness to learn together. Autism doesn’t just shape one person’s life; it shapes the whole family in beautiful, unexpected ways.

Listen to “Autism from a Sibling Perspective” on the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast to hear Lauren’s full story and discover how love, patience, and understanding can transform a family.

The Story Behind Caroline’s Cart and Inclusive Shopping

Table of Contents

Intro

It All Started with a Simple “No”

From a Napkin Sketch to a National Movement

Breaking Barriers in Retail Spaces

When Advocacy Turns Into Action

Rethinking What Inclusion Really Means

Lessons from Drew Ann’s Journey

Conclusion

The Story Behind Caroline’s Cart and Inclusive Shopping

What if something as simple as a shopping cart could change how the world sees inclusion? For many families raising children with disabilities, everyday tasks that most people take for granted, like grocery shopping can be emotionally and physically challenging. This is because stores are often not designed with accessibility in mind, and what should be a simple errand can turn into an exhausting experience.

This was the reality for Drew Ann Long, a mother who refused to accept the idea that families like hers had to struggle in silence. When she was told there was no such thing as a special needs shopping cart, she decided to create one herself. What began as a personal solution soon became a nationwide symbol of inclusion and advocacy.

Her invention, Caroline’s Cart, named after her daughter, has transformed shopping for countless families. Today, you can find it in major retail stores like Target, giving parents and caregivers the chance to shop comfortably with their loved ones. But the story behind it is more than a tale of innovation—it’s about determination, love, and the power of one idea to make a difference.

It All Started with a Simple “No”

Sometimes, change begins with a single word. For Drew Ann Long, that word was “no.” When she asked if there were any shopping carts designed for children or adults with special needs, she was told they didn’t exist. It wasn’t just a denial—it was a reminder of how often families like hers were left out of basic parts of everyday life.

That simple “no” hit hard. Imagine being a parent who just wants to include your child in normal experiences like grocery shopping, only to be told there’s no way to do it comfortably or safely. For Drew Ann, this moment was about more than convenience. It was about inclusion, dignity, and belonging.

Her daughter, Caroline, who has special needs, was growing older and bigger. Standard shopping carts were no longer an option, and pushing both a cart and a wheelchair at the same time was nearly impossible. Every trip to the store became a physical and emotional struggle—a reminder that the world wasn’t built with families like hers in mind.

Instead of accepting that reality, Drew Ann made a decision. If such a cart didn’t exist, she would create one herself. That determination marked the beginning of Caroline’s Cart, a life-changing innovation that would later transform accessibility for thousands of families.

In the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast episode, Drew Ann shares the exact moment this realization hit her—the frustration, the tears, and the sudden spark of determination that pushed her to take action. Her story is a reminder that every “no” can become the start of something powerful when met with courage and creativity.

From a Napkin Sketch to a National Movement

Every big idea starts somewhere, and for Drew Ann Long, it began right at her kitchen table with a napkin and a dream. After being told accessible shopping carts didn’t exist, she refused to let that be the end of the story. Instead, she grabbed a pen and sketched out what would become Caroline’s Cart, a specially designed shopping cart that could comfortably and safely hold older children or adults with disabilities.

It sounds simple now, but in the beginning, almost no one believed it could happen. Drew Ann faced one roadblock after another. Manufacturers turned her down, claiming the idea wasn’t practical or profitable. Retailers doubted there was enough demand, saying it wouldn’t make sense to invest in something for such a “small” group of shoppers. And funding? That was another mountain to climb.

But instead of giving up, Drew Ann used every “no” as fuel. She poured her energy into learning, researching, and reaching out. She connected with other parents who were struggling with the same challenges, and their support kept her going. Together, they became a powerful voice demanding change.

Social media played a huge role in the movement. What started as one mom’s frustration turned into an online community of families sharing stories, pictures, and encouragement. Those posts caught attention and soon, the message grew louder: inclusion matters everywhere, even in the grocery store.

On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast episode, Drew Ann shares how she leaned on her community’s strength when big companies didn’t listen. Her persistence turned what began as a simple napkin sketch into a nationwide symbol of inclusion. What was once a dream at her kitchen table is now a national movement—proof that one determined parent can truly change the world.

Breaking Barriers in Retail Spaces

When Caroline’s Cart finally made its way into major retail stores, it wasn’t just a new piece of equipment, it was a revolution in how families experienced something as ordinary as shopping. For years, parents like Drew Ann Long had been told that inclusion in everyday spaces was too complicated, too expensive, or simply unnecessary. But when stores like Target, Walmart, and other major retailers decided to adopt Caroline’s Cart, that message began to change in a powerful way.

Imagine a parent pushing a cart through the grocery aisle, finally able to shop with their child beside them instead of leaving them at home or struggling to juggle mobility aids. For many families, it was the first time they could go shopping together, not as caregivers managing a challenge, but as families doing something normal and joyful. The cart gave children and adults with disabilities a safe, dignified place to sit, while giving their loved ones the freedom to move through life’s routines with less stress and more connection.

For Drew Ann, seeing the cart in places like Target was deeply emotional. It wasn’t just about the product—it was about representation. The rollout proved that inclusion doesn’t always require big speeches or expensive programs. Sometimes, it’s about listening to real needs and making practical, compassionate changes that allow everyone to participate equally.

Caroline’s Cart also sparked conversations across industries. Retailers who had never thought about accessibility in this way started asking new questions: How can we make our stores more inclusive? How can we better serve families with special needs? It shifted the focus from compliance to compassion, from ticking boxes to truly creating belonging.

The presence of these carts in major stores also sent a message to the public. It said, “You belong here.” It told families who often felt invisible that their experiences matter—that they were seen, understood, and welcomed.

Listen to the podcast episode to hear Drew Ann’s powerful reaction to seeing Caroline’s Cart in Target for the very first time, and why that moment became a symbol of hope and inclusion for families everywhere.

When Advocacy Turns Into Action

For many people, advocacy stops at raising awareness — sharing stories, posting online, or speaking out about important issues. But for Drew Ann Long, awareness was just the beginning. After the incredible success of Caroline’s Cart, she realized that true inclusion doesn’t end with one invention. It grows through ongoing action, connection, and community. That’s what led her to create Caroline’s Cause, a nonprofit dedicated to supporting families and siblings of people with disabilities.

Drew Ann knew firsthand that families like hers needed more than just tools — they needed encouragement, resources, and support systems that make daily life easier. Through Caroline’s Cause, she began focusing on:

• Providing scholarships for siblings of children with disabilities, recognizing how much they contribute to their families’ journeys.

• Offering community outreach programs that bring families together to share experiences and find encouragement.

• Raising awareness in schools, workplaces, and local communities about what true inclusion looks like in action.

Her goal was simple but powerful, to make sure no family feels invisible or unsupported. She wanted to shift the conversation from “Look at what’s wrong” to “Look at what’s possible.”

What’s inspiring about Drew Ann’s advocacy is how personal it remains. She continues to speak from her lived experience as a mother, not just as an inventor or advocate. Her passion comes from knowing what it feels like to walk into a store, a school, or a playground and realize your child wasn’t considered in the design. That perspective fuels everything she does through Caroline’s Cause.

Rethinking What Inclusion Really Means

Inclusion isn’t just a nice idea, it’s a necessity. That’s one of the most powerful lessons Drew Ann Long hopes people take away from her story. Through her journey with Caroline’s Cart, she reminds us that inclusion should never be viewed as “going the extra mile.” It’s about basic human respect and the right for every person to participate in daily life without unnecessary barriers.

For Drew Ann, inclusion means creating spaces that welcome everyone, not just accommodate a few. It’s about designing with empathy from the start, thinking of people with disabilities not as an afterthought, but as part of the community. She often says that when accessibility works for one group, it often helps everyone. And she’s right.

Think about these examples:

• Stores with ramps and wide aisles don’t just help wheelchair users, they make it easier for parents pushing strollers or older adults using walkers.

• Sensory-friendly shopping hours benefit children and adults who find bright lights or loud sounds overwhelming and they create a calmer experience for everyone.

• Adaptive seating and accessible carts, like Caroline’s Cart, allow families to shop together with dignity and ease.

These simple, thoughtful changes aren’t luxuries; they’re reflections of respect and understanding.

On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, Drew Ann talks about how important it is for companies, schools, and communities to move from awareness to action. Inclusion isn’t just a buzzword,it’s a mindset that starts with empathy. When businesses and individuals start asking, “Who might feel left out?” and “What can we do to make this better?” — that’s when real progress happens.

She challenges all of us to think beyond our own experiences. Whether you’re a parent, teacher, business owner, or friend, there’s always a way to make the spaces around you more inclusive. It could be as simple as advocating for better accessibility in your local store or supporting policies that promote inclusive design in public spaces.

Ultimately, rethinking inclusion means recognizing that everyone deserves to belong — not as an exception, but as the rule. Drew Ann’s story shows that when we include people fully, we don’t just make life better for them — we make the world better for all of us.

To hear Drew Ann’s inspiring reflections on what true inclusion means, tune in to her full interview on the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast.

Lessons from Drew Ann’s Journey

Drew Ann Long’s story is full of powerful lessons that remind us how everyday determination can change the world. Her journey from a frustrated mom to a national advocate for inclusion shows what’s possible when one person refuses to give up.

1. Persistence pays off

When Drew Ann was told there was no such thing as a special needs shopping cart, she could have accepted it and moved on. But instead, she decided to create one. It wasn’t easy — she faced rejection from manufacturers, skepticism from retailers, and financial challenges. Yet, she kept pushing. Her persistence is a reminder that even when systems say “no,” change can still happen. Progress is built on persistence, not perfection.

2. Inclusion benefits everyone

Caroline’s Cart didn’t just change life for families of children with disabilities — it improved shopping experiences for countless people. Inclusion has a ripple effect. When stores, schools, and communities design spaces that work for everyone, they create environments that are more welcoming, efficient, and compassionate. Inclusion isn’t a favor; it’s an upgrade for society as a whole.

3. Start small

It all began with one mom, one child, and one simple idea drawn on a napkin. That’s the beauty of grassroots change, it often starts with a small act of courage. You don’t need a big platform or a million dollars to make an impact. You just need to care enough to take the first step.

4. Advocacy is contagious

Once people saw what Drew Ann was doing, others wanted to help. Communities rallied, companies listened, and families spoke up. One person’s voice inspired many others to raise theirs. That’s how movements grow, through shared hope and action.

Conclusion

Drew Ann Long’s story shows that true change often begins in the most ordinary moments,like a mother trying to take her daughter shopping. What started as frustration over a simple problem became a nationwide movement that redefined what inclusion looks like in everyday life. Because one mother refused to accept exclusion, families around the world can now shop together with dignity and ease.

Her journey reminds us that inclusion grows when empathy turns into action. It’s not enough to notice a problem; real progress happens when someone decides to fix it. Drew Ann didn’t wait for a company, a government, or a system to solve it for her — she used love, determination, and persistence to build something the world didn’t yet have.

Today, Caroline’s Cart stands as a symbol of what can happen when one voice speaks up for many. 

To hear Drew Ann’s inspiring journey in her own words, listen to “We Put Wheels on Inclusion” on the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast. 

Autism, Misdiagnosis, and Resilience

Table of Contents

intro

The Misdiagnosed Years

The Turning Point of Getting the Right Diagnosis

Rebuilding Life on His Own Terms

Redefining Success From Dropout to Role Model

Conclusion

Autism, Misdiagnosis, and Resilience 

Have you ever felt like something about you didn’t quite fit the world around you? Like no matter how hard you tried, things that seemed easy for others always felt like an uphill battle? For many people, that quiet confusion follows them for years, especially when they’re misunderstood or misdiagnosed.

That was the reality for Dave Kotera. Growing up, he knew he was different, but no one could tell him exactly why. He tried to fit in, to keep up, to meet expectations, but the labels placed on him didn’t match who he really was. Instead of helping, they made things harder—causing frustration, self-doubt, and a sense of being lost in his own story.

But Dave’s journey didn’t end there. Once he finally got the right diagnosis, everything began to change. He started to understand his mind, rebuild his confidence, and create a life that truly reflected who he was. What once looked like a story of struggle became one of strength and empowerment.

In this blog, we’ll explore how Dave went from being misdiagnosed and misunderstood to finding success and purpose. His story is a reminder that the right understanding can completely transform a life.

The Misdiagnosed Years

From an early age, Dave sensed that something about him was different. He struggled in ways other kids didn’t, whether it was staying focused, managing emotions, or navigating social situations. His parents and teachers noticed too, but no one could figure out exactly what was going on. Instead of clear answers, there were guesses, assumptions, and incorrect labels.

Those misdiagnoses shaped his early years. Rather than receiving support that actually fit his needs, Dave was often misunderstood. People expected him to act or learn in ways that simply didn’t align with how his brain worked. Over time, this created frustration and deep confusion. He began to question himself, wondering why he couldn’t just “get it right.”

The emotional toll was heavy. Living under the wrong label meant constantly trying to live up to expectations he couldn’t meet. It wasn’t just about academics or behavior—it was about identity. Dave felt “less than,” as if something inside him was broken or wrong. The truth is, misdiagnosis doesn’t only delay the right treatment, it chips away at confidence and self-worth. It makes people doubt their potential.

In the podcast, Dave shares how those years of confusion left him feeling trapped by labels that never fit and how he began to break free once he found real understanding.

The Turning Point of Getting the Right Diagnosis

For years, Dave lived in confusion, constantly wondering why life felt like a struggle that no one else seemed to face. Then came the moment that changed everything: receiving the right diagnosis. It wasn’t just a medical label—it was an explanation, a missing piece that made his entire life finally make sense.

When doctors confirmed what was really going on, it was as if a light had been turned on in a dark room. Suddenly, the things that once felt like flaws or failures had a reason behind them. He began to understand his brain, his emotions, and his behaviors through a new and more compassionate lens.

But the moment was not just about relief. It came with a flood of mixed emotions. There was grief for the years lost to misunderstanding and the pain of knowing things could have been different. Yet there was also a deep sense of empowerment. For the first time, Dave could move forward with clarity instead of confusion.

Getting the right diagnosis brought direction. It helped him see that his struggles were not because he was lazy, broken, or incapable, they were simply part of how his brain worked. With this understanding, he could finally begin to rebuild his confidence and make choices that supported his true needs.

Want to hear how Dave describes the exact moment everything clicked into place? Listen to his powerful story on the “On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories” podcast.

Rebuilding Life on His Own Terms

After leaving school, Dave found himself standing at a crossroads. The traditional path—graduate, get a job, follow the rules—was no longer an option. For a while, that reality was scary. The world often tells us that success must come from education and credentials, but Dave’s journey began to prove otherwise. He realized that he didn’t need to fit into someone else’s idea of success; he could create his own.

Without the structure of school, Dave started exploring the world in a hands-on way. He discovered that his natural curiosity, creativity, and determination were powerful tools for learning. Instead of absorbing lessons from textbooks, he learned from real experiences—trial and error, conversations, problem-solving, and observation. This approach allowed him to grow in ways that traditional education never could.

Slowly, Dave began to uncover his true strengths. He was great at thinking outside the box, finding innovative solutions, and working independently. These were the very skills that once made him feel out of place in school, but in the real world, they became his superpowers. What had once been seen as “difficult” or “different” was now the foundation of his success.

Rebuilding his life wasn’t just about finding a career; it was about rebuilding confidence, identity, and purpose. Dave learned that success isn’t about how perfectly you fit into a system—it’s about understanding who you are and using that knowledge to shape your own future.

His story is a reminder that there is no single path to achievement. The world needs people who think differently, solve problems creatively, and follow unconventional routes. And sometimes, stepping away from what doesn’t work is the first step toward discovering what truly does.

To hear how Dave turned his challenges into opportunities and built a life rooted in resilience and self-awareness, listen to his full story on the “On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories” podcast.

Redefining Success From Dropout to Role Model

Today, Dave’s story looks completely different from the struggles that once defined his early life. The boy who was once misdiagnosed, misunderstood, and labeled a “failure” has grown into someone who not only found his path but also helps others find theirs. Through his work, whether in his career, advocacy, or mentoring, Dave has become a living example that success is not about grades, degrees, or fitting into society’s mold—it’s about self-awareness, growth, and authenticity.

By learning to understand how his mind works, Dave gained the clarity and confidence he needed to move forward. He no longer sees his neurodivergence as a limitation but as a strength that allows him to think differently and connect with people in meaningful ways. That self-understanding has become the foundation of his achievements, both personally and professionally.

One of the most powerful parts of Dave’s journey is how he uses his experiences to empower others. He openly shares his story with people who feel “stuck,” reminding them that their worth is not defined by the system that may have failed them. Instead, he encourages others to embrace their individuality and create success on their own terms.

Dave’s life challenges the narrow definition of success that society often imposes. His story proves that being neurodivergent is not a barrier—it’s a unique way of seeing and experiencing the world. By accepting himself fully, Dave turned what once felt like obstacles into opportunities for impact.

Conclusion

Dave’s story is a powerful reminder that understanding yourself is the first and most important step toward true transformation. For years, he struggled under the weight of labels that didn’t fit, but once he discovered who he really was, everything changed. His journey from confusion to confidence shows that self-awareness can turn pain into purpose and misunderstanding into empowerment.

No label, diagnosis, or system can define your worth. Only you can decide what success looks like for your life. Dave’s resilience and determination prove that the path to fulfillment isn’t about fitting in, it’s about embracing who you are and building from there.

If you’ve ever felt misunderstood or limited by the expectations of others, Dave’s story offers real hope. It shows that with self-acceptance, persistence, and the courage to start again, transformation is always possible.

How Autism Sparks Creativity

Table of Contents

Intro

Early Signs of Creativity and Deep Focus

Turning Passion into Action: Luna’s Entrepreneurial Thinking

Challenges Behind the Brilliance

Thriving Beyond Expectations

Embracing Authenticity and Self-Acceptance

Lessons for Parents, Educators, and the Community

Conclusion

How Autism Sparks Creativity

When people think about autism, creativity isn’t always the first word that comes to mind. Society often focuses on challenges like communication or sensory differences, but rarely talks about the incredible imagination, focus, and problem-solving skills that many autistic individuals possess. The truth is, autism and creativity are deeply connected. Thinking differently often leads to seeing possibilities others might overlook.

Creativity doesn’t always look like painting or music—it can be the ability to notice patterns, think outside the box, or approach problems from a completely new angle. These are strengths that can lead to innovation, art, and even entrepreneurship. Many people on the spectrum have a natural ability to think deeply and uniquely, which can spark ideas that change their own lives and inspire others.

Luna, shared her inspiring story on the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, showing how her autism became the foundation of her creativity and confidence. Her journey reminds us that being different is not a disadvantage, it’s often where brilliance begins.

Early Signs of Creativity and Deep Focus

One of the clearest early clues that a child will grow into a creative thinker is the way they follow a single interest with quiet intensity. For many autistic children, that intense attention is called hyperfocus. It looks like a child who can sit with the same idea or activity for long stretches, not because they are stubborn, but because they are fully absorbed. That absorption is not a problem by itself. It is a powerful engine for learning and inventing.

Hyperfocus often gets misunderstood. Adults sometimes read it as a distraction or refusal to do other things. In reality, it means the child can dig deeper than most into a topic. That deep digging builds real skills. Kids who hyperfocus notice details others miss. They spot patterns. They teach themselves how something works simply by staying with it long enough to try different approaches. Those same strengths are the building blocks of creativity, whether the end result is a poem, a small product, a game, or a new way to solve a problem.

In the podcast episode, Luna’s mother describes how this showed up at home. Luna would pick a little project and return to it day after day, improving it each time. Those projects were not always big. They might begin as a handmade craft, a drawing series, a problem she wanted to fix, or a tiny business idea she tested with family members. The important part was the process. Luna’s imagination kept adding layers to her work. Her determination turned simple ideas into something real, and that process built confidence and practical skills at the same time.

If you want to help a child with this kind of focus, the aim is to give structure and permission. A few practical ways to do that are easy to try at home or at school:

• Provide a dedicated space and basic materials so a child can return to a project without losing momentum.

• Break bigger ideas into small, manageable steps so the child can see progress and not get stuck.

• Offer choices rather than orders. Let the child pick what to build or explore, and then guide them gently.

• Celebrate the process as much as the result. Praise curiosity, persistence, and problem solving, not just finished projects.

• Create chances to show work to others, even to a small group, so the child learns to communicate their ideas and get feedback.

Those supports do two things. They protect the child’s interest from being shut down as “just a phase,” and they teach real-world skills like planning, iteration, and presentation. Over time those skills look a lot like entrepreneurship: noticing a need, testing ideas, fixing what does not work, and sharing the result with people who need it.

Turning Passion into Action: Luna’s Entrepreneurial Thinking

What truly makes Luna’s story inspiring is not just her creativity, but the way she puts her ideas into action. A lot of people come up with good ideas, but few take the next step to bring those ideas to life. That’s where Luna stands out. She doesn’t just imagine something—she experiments, tests, and keeps going until it works. That’s the heart of an entrepreneurial mindset.

Being entrepreneurial isn’t only about starting a business. It’s about seeing a problem and wanting to fix it, noticing a need and finding a way to meet it, or simply creating something new because you believe it could make life a little better. Luna naturally thinks this way. When she sees something that could be improved, she doesn’t wait for permission—she starts brainstorming, building, and trying things out on her own.

In the podcast episode, Luna’s mother shares how her daughter has always had this drive. Whether it was creating small handmade crafts, developing creative projects, or organizing her ideas into something bigger, Luna showed persistence far beyond her years. She didn’t stop when things didn’t go perfectly. Instead, she looked for solutions. That kind of resilience is exactly what successful entrepreneurs are made of.

Interestingly, some of the traits that come with autism—like attention to detail, a love for structure, and a determination to see things through—are the same traits that make strong innovators and business thinkers. Where others might get distracted or give up, many autistic thinkers, like Luna, stay focused until the goal is met. Their logical way of processing ideas often helps them turn complex problems into practical steps.

Luna’s approach teaches an important lesson: creativity has the most impact when it’s paired with action. It’s not about having the biggest or boldest ideas—it’s about being curious enough to start, patient enough to learn, and brave enough to try again when things don’t go as planned.

If you’d like to hear more about how Luna turned her creativity into real-world projects and began thinking like an entrepreneur, listen to her story on the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast. It’s a wonderful reminder that innovation often starts with a spark of curiosity and the courage to follow it through.

Challenges Behind the Brilliance

Luna’s story isn’t just about success and creativity. Like many autistic children, her journey has also been filled with real challenges. She has faced moments of frustration, feeling misunderstood, and times when social situations felt too overwhelming. The noise, the pressure to fit in, and even small changes in routine could make things difficult. These moments were not easy for her or her family.

But what makes Luna’s story so powerful is how she and her family chose to respond to those challenges. Instead of letting the hard days hold her back, her parents helped her use creativity as a way to express herself and calm her mind. When she felt anxious or overstimulated, she would draw, build, or write. These activities became her safe spaces—places where she could make sense of her emotions and feel in control again.

Her environment also played a big role. With understanding teachers, supportive family members, and encouragement to explore her interests, Luna learned that her differences were not weaknesses. They were part of what made her special. By focusing on what she loved instead of what she struggled with, she found strength and confidence.

The beautiful lesson here is that creativity often grows out of challenge. Many great ideas come from moments of difficulty, frustration, or pain. Luna’s story reminds us that obstacles do not have to stop us, they can guide us toward discovering new talents and strengths we never knew we had.

In the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, Luna’s family shares how her challenges actually became her motivation. Each obstacle pushed her to find new ways to express herself, learn, and create. It’s a moving reminder that even in tough times, creativity can shine the brightest.

Thriving Beyond Expectations

Luna’s story is a beautiful example of what can happen when a child is encouraged to grow at her own pace and follow her natural curiosity. At only twelve years old, she has already accomplished things that many adults would admire. From creating her own projects to sharing her ideas confidently, Luna shows that when given support and understanding, children on the autism spectrum can achieve far more than most people expect.

One of the most powerful parts of Luna’s story is how her family refused to limit her. Instead of focusing on what she “couldn’t” do, they focused on what she could do—and that mindset made all the difference. They encouraged her to explore, ask questions, and create freely. Over time, this built her confidence and helped her see her autism not as a barrier, but as part of her strength.

Too often, society underestimates autistic children, assuming they will struggle to fit in or achieve big dreams. Luna’s story breaks that stereotype. She proves that when children are seen for their abilities, not their differences, they thrive. Her creativity, determination, and intelligence remind us that autism does not limit potential—it just expresses it in unique and beautiful ways.

On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, Luna and her mother talk about her dreams for the future and how she sees the world in her own creative way. Luna’s confidence shines through as she shares her ideas, showing that she believes in herself and her voice. That belief is something every child deserves to feel.

Luna’s journey teaches us that thriving isn’t about perfection or fitting into someone else’s idea of success. It’s about growing into who you truly are, celebrating what makes you different, and having people around you who believe in your potential. When that happens, like Luna, children don’t just meet expectations—they rise far beyond them.

Embracing Authenticity and Self-Acceptance

One of the most inspiring parts of Luna’s story is how she learned to embrace who she truly is. Instead of trying to blend in or change to meet other people’s expectations, Luna began to understand that her differences are what make her special. This journey toward self-acceptance became a turning point in her growth, both as a creative thinker and as a young girl learning to believe in herself.

For many children on the autism spectrum, there is often pressure to “fit in” with what society considers normal. That pressure can lead to hiding their true selves, which can dim their confidence and creativity. Luna’s experience shows the opposite. When she stopped trying to mask who she was and started embracing how her mind worked, she became even more creative and confident. Her imagination flowed freely, and her ideas became bigger and bolder because she no longer felt the need to hold back.

Authenticity is freeing. It allows people, especially children to use their energy for creating, learning, and growing, instead of worrying about being accepted. Luna’s story reminds us that empowerment doesn’t come from fitting into someone else’s mold. It comes from accepting and celebrating what makes you unique.

There’s also a deep emotional strength that grows from this kind of acceptance. Once Luna began to see her autism not as something to hide but as a gift, she developed more confidence and peace within herself. She learned to express her thoughts with pride and to see the value in her way of thinking.

On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast, Luna talks about how she learned to love her mind and the way it works. She calls it her greatest gift—and hearing her say that is both powerful and heartwarming. It’s a reminder to all of us that true creativity and confidence begin when we stop trying to be someone else and start embracing who we already are.

Lessons for Parents, Educators, and the Community

Luna’s story offers valuable lessons for parents, teachers, and anyone who interacts with children on the autism spectrum. It shows that when we nurture a child’s individuality instead of trying to change it, incredible growth can happen. Every child has a unique way of seeing the world, and that perspective can lead to creativity, innovation, and deep emotional intelligence if it’s supported in the right way.

For parents, the key is to nurture, not suppress. Rather than trying to make a child “fit in,” it’s far more powerful to help them explore what makes them different. Listen to what excites them, even if it’s something unconventional. Encourage their interests, whether that’s art, technology, animals, or storytelling. Small steps—like praising effort, allowing time for exploration, and celebrating small wins—can build a child’s confidence and motivation.

Educators also play a huge role in this process. Schools and classrooms that celebrate neurodiversity rather than trying to “normalize” every student can make a huge difference. Creating flexible learning spaces, being patient with communication differences, and offering opportunities for creative expression can help children on the spectrum thrive both academically and emotionally.

For the wider community, understanding and acceptance are essential. When society values neurodiversity, we make room for innovation and creativity that might otherwise be overlooked. Every time a teacher listens, a parent advocates, or a peer shows kindness, it helps build a world where neurodivergent children can feel seen and valued.

If you’re a parent or educator looking for inspiration or practical ideas, the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast is an excellent resource. The episode featuring Luna’s journey offers firsthand insight into how creativity, patience, and love can empower a child to flourish in ways no one could have predicted. It’s a reminder that with the right support, every child’s spark can become something extraordinary.

Conclusion

Luna’s story reminds us that autism is not a barrier to success or creativity—it can be a superpower. Her journey shows that thinking differently is often what drives innovation, empathy, and resilience. Instead of seeing autism as something that limits potential, we can begin to see it as something that reveals a new way of understanding the world.

Through Luna’s eyes, we see that creativity is not just about talent—it’s about perspective. Her ability to focus deeply, think logically, and dream boldly has led her to build ideas and projects beyond her years. What some might view as challenges have actually become her greatest strengths. And that’s the lesson for all of us: every person’s mind works differently, and those differences are what make the world richer and more creative.

To hear Luna’s full journey in her own words, listen to the episode “Luna’s Entrepreneurial Way of Thinking and Creativity Sparked Because of Her Autism” on the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories podcast. 

A Mother's Journey Advocating for Her Child's Autism

Table of Contents

Intro

The Challenge of Diagnosis and Early Intervention

Becoming an Advocate: A Mother’s Role

Finding Strength in Support Systems

Shifting from Deficit to Strength

Resilience Through Love and Self-Care

Looking Ahead: Hope for Drayson’s Future

Conclusion

A Mother's Journey Advocating for Her Child's Autism

Raising a child on the autism spectrum is one of those journeys that no parent can fully prepare for. One moment, you’re just trying to figure out how to support your child’s everyday needs, and the next, you’re thrown into the role of advocate—navigating doctors, schools, therapies, and systems that often feel overwhelming and confusing.

This is exactly what Drayson’s mother faced. Her story, shared on On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories, is both heart-wrenching and deeply inspiring. She opens up about the challenges of getting a diagnosis, the emotional weight of constantly fighting for support, and the resilience she discovered along the way. Through her honesty, we get a window into what so many families experience but often don’t say out loud.

In this blog, we’ll walk through some of the biggest lessons from her journey—how she faced the early struggles of diagnosis, the role of advocacy, the importance of community support, and the hope she continues to carry for Drayson’s future.

The Challenge of Diagnosis and Early Intervention

For many families, one of the hardest parts of raising a child on the autism spectrum is the beginning—the diagnosis stage. It is supposed to provide clarity, but more often, it feels like stepping into a maze without a map. Parents are faced with endless appointments, evaluations, and forms filled with unfamiliar language. Instead of answers, there are often more questions.

Drayson’s mother described this stage as one of the most overwhelming parts of the journey. She was trying to process what the professionals were saying while also managing her own emotions and concerns for her son’s future. Imagine being told different things by different specialists, or having to wait months for testing while your child’s needs grow more urgent. It is confusing, exhausting, and deeply emotional.

On top of that, there is the heavy toll it takes on parents’ hearts. Many wonder if they are doing enough, if they are missing signs, or if they are somehow to blame. These thoughts can spiral quickly, making an already difficult process even more painful.

That is why early support is so important. It is not just about interventions for the child—it is also about giving parents guidance, reassurance, and resources so they do not feel like they are carrying everything alone.

On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories episode, Drayson’s mother shared just how heavy those early stages felt. Her reminder to other families is powerful: no parent should have to go through the diagnostic process in isolation. Having the right support early on can make all the difference.

Becoming an Advocate: A Mother’s Role

When you are raising a child on the autism spectrum, you quickly realize that advocacy is not just something you do once in a while—it becomes a daily responsibility. Whether it is pushing for services in school, sitting in on therapy sessions, or navigating insurance paperwork, parents often find themselves wearing the hat of both caregiver and advocate.

For Drayson’s mom, advocacy became part of her everyday life. She had to learn how to speak up in meetings, ask the hard questions, and fight for what her son needed. That meant making sure teachers understood his challenges, that therapists were giving him the right support, and that systems designed to help were actually working for him. It was not easy, but it was necessary.

Of course, constantly being in “fight mode” takes a toll. Many parents describe the exhaustion that comes with always being on alert. Drayson’s mom admitted there were moments when she felt completely burned out, unsure if she was doing enough or if she was making the right choices. Advocacy requires so much emotional energy that it can sometimes leave parents drained and questioning themselves.

And yet, she also saw advocacy as one of the deepest acts of love she could give her child. It was her way of making sure Drayson had opportunities, access, and dignity in spaces where he might otherwise have

Finding Strength in Support Systems

One of the hardest parts of parenting a child with autism is the feeling that you are alone in it. In the beginning, many parents feel isolated—like no one else truly understands what they are going through. But something powerful happens when you start connecting with others who share similar experiences. That sense of isolation begins to lift, and in its place, you find encouragement, reassurance, and even practical tools to keep going.

For Drayson’s mom, finding support systems was life-changing. Talking to other parents who were also navigating the challenges of autism helped her realize that her struggles were not unique, and that she did not have to carry everything by herself. These conversations offered more than comfort—they gave her strategies, fresh perspectives, and sometimes just the reminder that she was not failing, she was learning.

Educators and therapists also became part of her support network. By working alongside them instead of feeling like she had to battle them, she began to see progress in Drayson’s journey. Having professionals who listened, offered guidance, and celebrated even the smallest wins made a huge difference.

Support also came through safe spaces, places where she could share openly about her fears and frustrations without judgment. This kind of community, whether in parent groups, therapy sessions, or friendships, reminded her that vulnerability could actually lead to strength.

In the podcast episode, Drayson’s mom emphasizes how crucial these allies were in keeping her grounded and hopeful. Advocacy is heavy, but when you surround yourself with people who “get it,” the journey feels lighter and more possible.

Shifting from Deficit to Strength

When a child is first diagnosed with autism, much of the focus tends to fall on what they can’t do yet. Doctors, therapists, and even schools often create long lists of deficits, things that need to be “fixed” or “improved.” While support and intervention are important, constantly framing a child this way can make both parents and children feel discouraged, as if their worth is measured only by what is missing.

Drayson’s mom shares that a turning point in her journey came when she began shifting her perspective. Instead of seeing only the challenges, she chose to notice and celebrate her son’s strengths. Every milestone, no matter how small—whether it was a new word, a small social interaction, or even progress in daily routines—became a moment of celebration. These victories reminded her that her child was growing, thriving, and capable in his own unique way.

This change in mindset also reshaped how she approached advocacy. Rather than simply fighting for services to address “deficits,” she began to push for opportunities that highlighted Drayson’s gifts and abilities. The message became clear: neurodivergent children are not broken; they are capable, gifted, and deserving of respect.

In the podcast episode, this perspective shift is described as a source of empowerment. By moving away from a deficit-based view and focusing on strengths, parents and communities can create a world where children like Drayson are seen for who they truly are—whole, valuable, and full of potential.

Resilience Through Love and Self-Care

One of the hardest truths about parenting—especially when raising a child on the autism spectrum, is that you cannot pour from an empty cup. Advocacy requires enormous strength, patience, and persistence, but it is impossible to sustain if you are constantly running on fumes. Drayson’s mom shares how she learned, often the hard way, that her resilience as a parent and advocate depended on caring for her own well-being first.

For her, love was always the driving force. The unconditional love for her child pushed her through sleepless nights, difficult meetings with schools, and moments when the system felt like it was working against her. But love alone wasn’t enough. To keep showing up with strength, she had to create space for her own self-care—whether that meant carving out moments of rest, seeking emotional support, or allowing herself to admit when things felt overwhelming.

Protecting mental health became a priority. This meant recognizing when burnout was creeping in, setting boundaries where necessary, and practicing patience with herself as much as with her child. She leaned on faith to keep her grounded, persistence to keep moving forward, and hope to remind her that even on the hardest days, progress was possible.

In the podcast, she emphasizes that advocacy is not a sprint but a marathon. Parents need to be gentle with themselves because resilience grows not only from fighting for your child but also from caring for your own heart and mind. When parents are healthier and more balanced, they are better able to create the supportive, loving environment their children need to thrive.

Looking Ahead: Hope for Drayson’s Future

Advocacy is not only about handling today’s challenges—it is about building a better tomorrow. For Drayson’s mother, every meeting with a teacher, every request for services, and every difficult conversation with professionals is more than a battle for the present moment. It is an investment in Drayson’s future. She wants to ensure that as he grows, the opportunities available to him are not limited by outdated systems or narrow perspectives.

Her hope is grounded in the belief that Drayson, like every child, has incredible potential. She refuses to let society define him only by his challenges. Instead, she envisions a world where his strengths are celebrated and where inclusive environments allow him to thrive. Whether it is in education, work, or community life, the goal is to create spaces where children like Drayson are not just accommodated but truly valued.

This vision is not only personal—it reflects a broader call for systemic change. Advocacy must shift schools, workplaces, and communities toward inclusion and empowerment, so that neurodivergent children can step into futures filled with possibility.

Conclusion

Advocacy is rarely a smooth road. It comes with sleepless nights, hard conversations, and moments where giving up feels easier. But as Drayson’s story shows, advocacy is also transformative. It changes the child who gains opportunities, the parent who grows in resilience and courage, and even the community that learns to see children with differences in a new light.

Drayson’s mother reminds us that persistence is not about never getting tired—it’s about continuing even when it’s hard, fueled by love. Advocacy is sustained not only by the parent’s determination but also by community, faith, and the belief that every child deserves to be valued for who they are.

Her journey makes one thing clear: empowerment is possible. It does not come overnight, but through patience, consistency, and the willingness to fight for a future where children on the spectrum are seen for their abilities, not just their challenges. If you want to feel the heart behind this journey, I encourage you to listen to the full episode of On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories. 

How to Navigate Holiday Dynamics with Autism

Table of Contents

Intro

Why Holidays Can Feel Overwhelming

Social Expectations and Family Pressures

Recognizing and Avoiding Unhealthy Dynamics

Practical Self-Care Strategies During Holidays

Redefining “Togetherness”

Affirming Value and Identity

Conclusion

Navigating Holiday Dynamics with Autism

The holidays are often described as the most wonderful time of the year. We imagine cozy family dinners, joyful laughter, and magical moments filled with love and connection. But for many people on the autism spectrum, the holiday season can feel very different. Instead of peace and joy, it often brings feelings of overwhelm, isolation, or exhaustion.

Big family gatherings, endless social expectations, and constant noise can quickly create sensory overload. Add in the pressure to appear cheerful or meet family standards, and what should feel like celebration can turn into stress.

In this blog, we will explore helpful insights from On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories with Sonia Krishna Chand, a podcast episode that dives into the real challenges autistic individuals face during the holidays and the strategies that can make the season more manageable and meaningful.

Why Holidays Can Feel Overwhelming

For many people, the holidays bring together family, friends, and traditions. But for individuals on the autism spectrum, this season can also bring unique challenges that often go unnoticed by others.

One of the biggest difficulties is the sudden increase in social demands. Holiday gatherings usually mean multiple events, long dinners, and extended family interactions. While these moments can be enjoyable, they can also drain energy and leave little time for rest or recovery.

Another challenge is sensory overload. Holiday environments are often filled with noise from conversations and music, the strong smells of cooking, and the closeness of crowded rooms. For someone who is sensitive to sensory input, these elements can quickly become overwhelming and stressful.

On top of that, there is the emotional expectation to appear cheerful and festive. Even when someone is struggling, they may feel pressure to smile, participate, and keep up with the joyful atmosphere around them. This pressure can add another layer of exhaustion and emotional strain.

In this podcast episode, these challenges are discussed in depth. The conversation highlights how the combination of extra social demands, sensory triggers, and emotional expectations can create significant stress during the holidays for many autistic individuals.

Social Expectations and Family Pressures

Holiday conversations often start light, but for many autistic people a few common questions can cut deep. Phrases like “Why aren’t you married yet?” or “Do you have a partner?” sound ordinary to some, yet they can feel intrusive, judgmental, or shaming to someone who already struggles with social connection. These questions put private timelines on public display and ask a person to explain choices or circumstances that might be painful or complicated. Over time, repeated small comments like these build up and erode self-confidence.

Also, watching siblings or peers hit life milestones can make those moments worse. Seeing friends announce engagements, promotions, or new babies creates a natural moment of comparison. For someone whose path looks different, that comparison can magnify feelings of not belonging. It is not just envy; it is a reminder that social norms and expectations are being used as a measure of personal worth. That pressure is especially strong during holidays, when family narratives about success and “where you should be” are on full display.

In addition, family gatherings also tend to spotlight difference in ways that feel public and unavoidable. Small things—making less eye contact, preferring quiet corners, not joining large group games, can be noticed and misread. Those moments of being singled out add to a sense of otherness, and they can trigger masking behavior. Masking, or forcing oneself to perform what others expect, is exhausting and can lead to burnout long after the gathering ends.

In the podcast episode of On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories with Sonia Krishna Chand, the host highlights how these casual comments and comparison triggers can deeply affect confidence and mental health. The takeaway is simple but important: what might seem like harmless small talk can carry a heavy emotional cost for someone who already feels different. Recognizing that cost is the first step toward more compassionate conversations at family events.

Recognizing and Avoiding Unhealthy Dynamics

The holidays are not only a time for family but also a season when many people start new relationships or reconnect with old ones. While this can be exciting, it can also bring risks, especially for autistic individuals who may find it harder to read intentions or pick up on subtle warning signs. One common red flag to watch for is love bombing. This happens when someone showers you with attention, affection, or gifts at the very beginning of a relationship, making it feel intense and special. The problem is that this behavior often fades quickly, leaving behind confusion, disappointment, or even manipulation.

For autistic individuals, love bombing can feel particularly convincing. Because processing social cues and distinguishing between genuine affection and exaggerated attention may be more difficult, it is easier to mistake manipulation for true care. This vulnerability does not mean a person is weak—it simply highlights the importance of slowing down and giving relationships time to reveal their true nature.

Practical steps can help protect emotional well-being. First, take time before fully trusting someone new, no matter how persuasive or affectionate they seem at first. Second, pay attention to whether actions consistently match their words—real care shows up over time. Finally, avoid sharing too much personal information early in a relationship, since this can be misused if the person does not have good intentions.

Practical Self-Care Strategies During Holidays

The holidays can feel like a marathon of social events, family gatherings, and constant stimulation. For autistic individuals, these moments can be especially draining, but the truth is that everyone benefits from intentional self-care. The key is to go into the season prepared with strategies that build confidence and protect your well-being.

Build Confidence Before Events:

Preparation starts long before walking into a family dinner or party. Small practices can make a big difference. Positive affirmations—simple reminders like “I belong here” or “I am enough as I am”—can set a grounding mindset. Wearing your favorite colors or a comfortable outfit can also provide a sense of security and familiarity. Most importantly, take a moment to remind yourself of your worth and value. You do not need to prove anything to anyone; just showing up as yourself is enough.

During Gatherings:

Even with preparation, large gatherings can become overwhelming. Recognizing when you need a break is part of healthy self-care. Stepping outside for fresh air, finding a quiet room for a few minutes, or simply closing your eyes to breathe deeply can reset your nervous system. It can also help to set personal time limits before you attend an event. Give yourself permission to leave early if needed—staying the whole time is not a requirement for connection.

Boundaries Are Healthy:

Saying no to an invitation or choosing to leave halfway through a gathering does not mean you have failed or disappointed anyone. It means you are protecting your emotional and sensory well-being. Boundaries are not barriers; they are tools that help you show up authentically and avoid burnout.

In the On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories with Sonia Krishna Chand podcast, Sonia emphasizes how grounding tools like these can make gatherings less overwhelming and more manageable. By practicing self-care with intention, holidays can shift from being something you dread to experiences where you feel in control, safe, and even joyful.

Redefining “Togetherness”

When people think about the holidays, they often imagine big family gatherings, crowded dinner tables, and endless hours spent socializing. While this may be meaningful for some, it is not the only way to experience connection or togetherness. For many autistic individuals—and even for those who are simply introverted or easily overwhelmed—those long hours in noisy spaces can feel more draining than joyful. That is why it is important to redefine what togetherness really means.

Breaking the Myth

Togetherness is not about the size of the group or the number of hours spent with people. It is about the quality of the connection. One meaningful conversation with someone who truly sees and values you can be far more fulfilling than a day spent in a crowded room where you feel invisible or misunderstood.

Alternative Approaches to Connection:

• Smaller Gatherings: Choosing to spend time with just one or two trusted people can create a safe, intimate environment where you can relax and genuinely connect.

• Shorter Interactions: You do not have to stay for the entire event. Sometimes attending for an hour and then leaving before exhaustion sets in allows you to enjoy the moment without overwhelming yourself.

• Personalized Celebrations: Togetherness can also mean honoring the season in your own way. This might include solo rituals like lighting candles, journaling, or listening to calming music. It could even involve online connections with supportive communities or engaging in creative projects that bring you joy.

Sometimes showing up for yourself—by choosing smaller, calmer, or more creative ways to connect—is just as valid and deeply valuable.

By redefining togetherness, you give yourself permission to celebrate the holidays in a way that feels right for you. It is not about meeting other people’s expectations but about finding connection that nourishes your well-being.

Affirming Value and Identity

The holiday season can sometimes highlight differences in ways that feel uncomfortable. Questions about careers, relationships, or milestones often place pressure on people to measure their worth against society’s timelines. For autistic individuals, this can be particularly difficult, since their paths may look different from what others expect. But difference does not mean less. In fact, embracing unique strengths and experiences is where true value shines.

Autistic Voices Matter:

Being autistic does not diminish capability, intelligence, or contribution. Every individual has gifts, perspectives, and talents that add depth and richness to the world. Affirming this truth is critical, especially during holiday gatherings when unhelpful comparisons may surface.

Societal Timelines vs. Personal Growth:

Many people are taught to believe there is a “right” time for milestones like marriage, children, or certain careers. But life does not have a universal schedule. Achievements that come later or in different forms are no less meaningful. For autistic individuals, growth often unfolds at a personal pace that should be respected and celebrated.

Importance of Community Support:

Resilience grows when people feel appreciated and affirmed for who they are, not who they are expected to be. Simple acts—like listening without judgment, celebrating small wins, or acknowledging strengths—create an environment where autistic individuals feel valued and included.

Conclusion

The holidays are often wrapped in images of perfection—big family meals, endless socializing, and nonstop cheer. But authenticity matters more than appearances. The truth is, the season does not have to mean forcing joy or fitting into someone else’s mold. It can be redefined in ways that respect individual needs, honor personal boundaries, and celebrate strengths.

When we choose self-care, we give ourselves permission to step away when things feel overwhelming. When we set boundaries, we create the space to breathe, rest, and enjoy the holidays on our own terms. And when we lean into supportive communities, whether that’s one trusted friend or an affirming group, we replace pressure with connection. These shifts may seem small, but together they transform the holidays into something lighter, more manageable, and deeply empowering.

For more empowering strategies and heartfelt reflections, listen to the full episode.

Breaking Autism Stereotypes

Table of Contents

Intro

The Struggle with Connection

Finding Belonging in Unexpected Places

Turning Passion into Purpose

From Advocate to Motivational Speaker

Breaking Autism Stereotypes

Lessons for Everyone

Conclusion

Breaking Autism Stereotypes

Society often views autism through a very limited perspective. Many people only see the stereotypes that have been repeated over time, such as the belief that autistic individuals lack empathy or cannot communicate. These assumptions overlook the complexity of the spectrum and the individuality of each autistic person. Real stories, shared in honest and personal ways, have the power to challenge these misconceptions and create a deeper understanding.

In this episode of On the Spectrum Empowerment Stories, Sam Mitchell opens up about his own journey. Sam is an autistic self-advocate, podcaster, and motivational speaker. He talks about what it was like to grow up on the spectrum, how he learned to embrace his identity, and how he now uses his platform to educate others and break down harmful stereotypes.

This blogpost will highlight the major lessons from Sam’s story. You will see how he turned his personal struggles into strengths, how he found belonging by being true to himself, and how his advocacy continues to create awareness about autism.

To fully experience Sam’s passion and authenticity, make sure to listen to the full podcast episode where he shares his journey in his own words.

The Struggle with Connection

While Sam was fortunate not to experience direct bullying, his childhood was still marked by a different kind of pain. He often felt socially excluded, not because people were intentionally cruel, but because his interests and way of connecting were different from those around him.

One example he shared was his love for professional wrestling. To him, wrestling was exciting and meaningful, but most of his peers could not relate to that passion. Instead of sharing conversations and building friendships through common interests, he often found himself on the outside looking in. This created a sense of loneliness that lingered throughout his younger years.

Sam’s experience shows that isolation is not always the result of bullying or harsh words. Sometimes, exclusion happens more quietly when people simply do not make the effort to understand or include someone who is different. The absence of connection can be just as painful as outright cruelty because it reinforces the feeling of being unseen or misunderstood.

The takeaway is clear: empathy and inclusion matter deeply. By showing curiosity about another person’s interests and making space for differences, we create opportunities for connection. Small gestures of understanding can transform an environment from isolating to welcoming.

Finding Belonging in Unexpected Places

As Sam grew older, particularly during his teenage years, he reached an important turning point. After years of trying to fit in with peers who did not fully understand him, he decided to stop chasing acceptance from people who could not see his value. This shift in mindset was powerful. Instead of molding himself to be like everyone else, Sam began to seek out spaces where he could simply be himself.

What he found was a community of people who also felt different or misunderstood in their own ways. These were peers who did not expect him to hide his quirks or change his interests. They welcomed him as he was, and in turn, Sam realized that being different did not mean being alone. This acceptance allowed him to build authentic friendships and experience the sense of belonging he had long been missing.

The result was more than just companionship. This new community gave Sam a renewed sense of confidence. For the first time, he could show up without pretending, masking, or shrinking himself to fit into other people’s expectations. That freedom opened the door to deeper self-acceptance and the ability to walk through life with his head held high.

The lesson here is that true belonging does not come from trying to win the approval of everyone around us. It comes from connecting with people who appreciate us exactly as we are. When we stop chasing external validation and instead embrace relationships built on mutual respect and understanding, we find the kind of belonging that nourishes the soul.

Turning Passion into Purpose

For Sam, professional wrestling was never just entertainment. From an early age, it sparked excitement, curiosity, and deep focus. What some might have dismissed as “just a hobby” became a foundation for creativity and self-expression. Professional wrestling gave Sam a way to connect with larger-than-life stories of struggle, resilience, and triumph. It also gave him language and imagery to make sense of his own experiences of feeling different and pushing through challenges.

Instead of letting his passion remain private, Sam found a way to share it with others. This is what eventually led him to create his podcast, Autism Rocks and Rolls. What started as an outlet for self-expression grew into something much bigger. On the podcast, Sam not only highlights the voices of autistic individuals but also bridges his love for wrestling by interviewing professional wrestlers. This unique mix allows him to draw connections between the strength, resilience, and individuality celebrated in wrestling and the lived experiences of people on the autism spectrum.

Through this platform, Sam transformed what many might have labeled a “special interest” into a tool for advocacy and awareness. His podcast became a space where listeners could learn about autism in a real, human way—directly from someone living it. It also challenged the stereotype that autistic people cannot lead, communicate, or inspire. By following his passion and using it to educate and empower, Sam proved that interests are not limitations but powerful springboards for purpose-driven work.

From Advocate to Motivational Speaker

Sam’s journey did not stop at creating a podcast. What began as a platform to share his story and amplify autistic voices eventually opened the door to public speaking. Over time, Sam realized that his message carried weight beyond the digital space. By stepping onto stages and speaking directly to audiences, he was able to connect with people in a deeper and more immediate way.

As a motivational speaker, Sam educates schools, communities, and organizations about what it truly means to live with autism. His talks dismantle long-standing stereotypes that paint autistic individuals as “less than” or incapable. Instead, he reframes the conversation by highlighting that autistic people are not broken. They simply experience and process the world differently. This perspective shifts the focus from limitations to possibilities, encouraging listeners to view autism through a lens of respect, understanding, and inclusion.

Through storytelling, Sam helps audiences see the humanity behind the label. He blends personal experiences with practical insights, making his talks both relatable and eye-opening. His presence on stage also serves as a powerful counter to stereotypes, as he embodies confidence, clarity, and leadership—qualities that some assume autistic people cannot express.

The key takeaway is that advocacy grows when personal stories move from small circles to bigger platforms. By sharing his truth on public stages, Sam not only spreads awareness but also inspires others to create inclusive environments where differences are celebrated. His evolution from podcaster to speaker demonstrates how personal passion, when combined with courage, can ripple outward and spark meaningful cultural change.

This post only scratches the surface of Sam’s journey. Hear his full story and insights by listening to the complete episode.

Breaking Autism Stereotypes

One of the biggest barriers autistic people face is not the condition itself, but the stereotypes that surround it. Society often assumes that autistic individuals cannot communicate effectively, struggle with empathy, or lack the ability to build meaningful relationships. Sam’s life is a direct challenge to those assumptions. Through his podcast, his public speaking, and his openness about his own experiences, he shows that autistic people not only communicate but can do so with passion, clarity, and purpose.

Sam also emphasizes the importance of individuality. Autism is not a one-size-fits-all experience. Just as no two neurotypical people are the same, no two autistic people are identical either. Some may be introverted while others thrive in social situations. Some may express themselves best through words, others through art, music, or unique passions. By highlighting this truth, Sam helps people see beyond the label and recognize the human being behind it.

His own journey illustrates the incredible strengths that often come with autism. Qualities such as deep focus, creativity, persistence, and determination can all be powerful assets when nurtured and valued. What some may dismiss as a limitation is often the very trait that helps autistic individuals excel in areas they are passionate about. For Sam, his intense focus on professional wrestling not only gave him joy but eventually led him to build a platform for advocacy.

The key takeaway is simple but profound: stereotypes crumble when we listen to lived experiences. Instead of relying on outdated assumptions, hearing directly from autistic voices reveals the richness, diversity, and capability within the community. By sharing his story, Sam not only redefines what autism can look like but also invites others to challenge their own perspectives and embrace a more inclusive view of neurodiversity.

Lessons for Everyone

Sam’s story is not only about autism, it is about what it means to be human. One of the most important lessons he shares is that inclusion goes far beyond simply avoiding harm. True inclusion means actively choosing to value and embrace the differences that make each person unique. It is about creating spaces where people are not just tolerated, but celebrated for who they are.

Another powerful lesson is the value of special interests. Too often, society dismisses them as obsessions or quirks. In reality, they are passions that can fuel creativity, purpose, and even careers. When we encourage people to lean into what excites them instead of forcing them to conform, we open doors to innovation and fulfillment.

Sam’s journey also shows that belonging may require redefining what we think of as “normal.” The traditional idea of fitting in often means changing ourselves to match the majority, but real belonging happens when we connect with people who appreciate us exactly as we are. This shift in perspective benefits not only autistic people but everyone searching for genuine connection.

Finally, voices like Sam’s are essential in reshaping how the world understands autism. Hearing directly from those with lived experience breaks down stereotypes and replaces them with compassion and truth. The more we listen, the more we learn that diversity—whether neurological, cultural, or personal—is a strength that enriches communities.

Conclusion

Autism is not a stereotype. It is a wide spectrum of lived experiences, each one unique, valuable, and worthy of respect. Sam’s story is a clear reminder that no single narrative can define what it means to be autistic. By stepping forward and sharing his truth, he invites us to see beyond the labels and challenge the narrow ways society often frames autism.

The key message is simple yet profound: when autistic voices are the ones leading the conversation, we all gain a deeper and more accurate understanding. We learn to see the strengths, creativity, and humanity that might otherwise be overlooked. Inclusion begins with listening. It begins with pausing our assumptions long enough to hear stories like Sam’s.

If you want to truly understand autism beyond the stereotypes, listen to the full conversation with Sam on the podcast

Do Autistic People Have Empathy

Introduction Understanding Empathy 

The Two Types of Empathy

Why the Myth Exists

What Research Really Says

Real-Life Examples of Empathy in Autism

Why You Should Read Dropped in a Maze: My Life on the Spectrum

How You Can Foster Empathy Across the Spectrum

Conclusion

Do Autistic People Have Empathy? The Truth Behind the Myth

One of the most common and hurtful myths about autism is the idea that autistic people do not have empathy. This belief has been around for decades and has caused many autistic people to be misunderstood, excluded, and judged unfairly. When someone thinks you have no empathy, they may believe you cannot care about others, cannot form deep relationships, or cannot understand feelings. This is far from the truth.

The truth is that autistic people do have empathy. They may show it in different ways. They may experience it differently. But the idea that empathy is missing is wrong. Understanding this topic is important for parents, teachers, friends, and anyone who interacts with autistic individuals. By learning the truth, you can treat autistic people with respect and build real connections.

Understanding Empathy

When people talk about empathy, they often imagine a warm hug, kind words, or an emotional expression that’s easy to see. But empathy is much more complex than that. To understand whether autistic people have empathy, we need to start by understanding what empathy actually is, not what movies or social rules tell us it should look like.

The Two Types of Empathy

Empathy is not a single skill. In psychology, it’s usually described in two main forms:

1. Cognitive Empathy

Cognitive empathy means understanding what another person is thinking or feeling. It’s about perspective-taking, putting yourself in someone else’s shoes and seeing the world through their eyes.

For example:

• If a friend frowns, you might guess they are upset.

• If your co-worker stays quiet during a meeting, you might sense they are nervous.

Cognitive empathy is more about recognition than emotion.

Many autistic people can have differences in cognitive empathy because reading facial expressions, tone of voice, or body language might not come as naturally. It’s not that they don’t care; they might simply need more information before they can identify exactly what the other person is feeling.

2. Affective Empathy

Affective empathy is feeling the emotion someone else feels. It’s an emotional connection that often happens instantly. If your best friend is sad, you might feel sad too. If they are overjoyed, you share that joy with them.

Research has shown that many autistic people have very strong affective empathy, sometimes even stronger than non-autistic people. They may deeply feel someone’s happiness, pain, or distress. The challenge comes when that feeling is so intense that it becomes overwhelming. In such cases, an autistic person might shut down or step away not because they don’t care, but because the emotion is too much to handle at once.

How Autistic People Experience Empathy Differently

The key point here is difference, not absence.
Autistic individuals may:

• Need more direct communication to understand emotions.

• Show care through actions instead of emotional words.

• Feel emotions so strongly that they struggle to express them right away.
  
  
  
  

This difference in experience can lead to misunderstandings, which brings us to something researchers call the double empathy problem.

The “Double Empathy Problem”

The double empathy problem is a theory first introduced by researcher Damian Milton. It challenges the old idea that autistic people alone have a “social deficit.” Instead, it says that difficulties in mutual understanding happen on both sides between autistic and non-autistic people.

What It Means

Communication is a two-way street.

• Non-autistic people may not understand autistic communication styles.

• Autistic people may not understand non-autistic communication styles.

This mismatch means that both sides can misread each other’s intentions and feelings.

For example, a non-autistic person might expect constant eye contact to show interest. But an autistic person may find eye contact uncomfortable and prefer to listen without it. The non-autistic person might think, “They’re ignoring me,” while the autistic person is actually paying close attention.

Why This Matters

The double empathy problem shows us that we can’t just measure empathy by one group’s social standards. Instead, we need to recognize that empathy can look different across people and that’s okay.

By understanding this, we can start replacing the harmful myth of “autistic people have no empathy” with the truth: empathy exists on both sides, but differences in communication and perception can hide it.

Why the Myth Exists

If autistic people can and do have empathy, why is the myth still so strong? There are several reasons, all tied to how empathy is expressed, communicated, and portrayed.

Differences in Expression

One major reason the myth exists is because empathy is often judged by visible signs. In many cultures, empathy is expected to be shown in certain ways:

• Direct eye contact

• A warm tone of voice

• Certain facial expressions

• Verbal affirmations like “I’m so sorry” or “I understand”

• Physical comfort like hugs or pats on the back

But here’s the truth: these are cultural rules, not universal truths.

An autistic person may:

• Show care by fixing a problem rather than talking about it.

• Remember small details about someone’s life and follow up on them later.

• Help quietly, without big emotional displays.

To someone expecting “typical” social signals, this might seem like a lack of empathy. But it’s really just a different way of showing it.

Communication Barriers

Empathy is not only about feeling, it’s also about expressing those feelings. And sometimes, expression is the hardest part.

Autistic individuals may face challenges such as:

• Literal thinking: taking words at face value, which can sometimes make emotional cues harder to pick up without clear statements.

• Sensory overload: when the environment is too loud, bright, or chaotic, it can be hard to focus on emotional exchange.

• Anxiety: social pressure to respond “the right way” can make it harder to react in the moment.

Media Portrayals

Popular culture has played a huge role in shaping the public’s perception of autism and unfortunately, it hasn’t always been accurate.

In many movies and TV shows, autistic characters are shown as:

• Highly logical but emotionally distant

• Robotic in their responses

• Unaware of others’ feelings entirely

While these portrayals may be based on small aspects of real experiences, they leave out the emotional depth that many autistic people have. Over time, these stereotypes have been repeated so often that people start to believe them as facts.

The problem is that real life is far more nuanced. Every autistic person is different. Many are deeply sensitive, caring, and emotionally aware. But when society mainly sees the “emotionless genius” stereotype, it’s easy for myths to take root.

What Science Really Says About Empathy in Autism

Research over the years has shown that autistic people can have equal or even higher levels of emotional empathy than non-autistic people. Some studies have found that autistic people feel emotions so strongly that it can be overwhelming, and they may need time alone to process them.

The problem is not a lack of empathy. The problem is often a mismatch between how empathy is expressed and how it is expected to look. This is sometimes called the “double empathy problem.” It means both autistic and non-autistic people can struggle to understand each other’s ways of communicating.

Examples of Empathy in Autism

Empathy is not always about big gestures. Sometimes it is shown in quiet, unnoticed ways.

• An autistic child may notice that a friend’s shoelace is untied and tie it for them without saying anything.

• An autistic teenager may remember small details about a friend’s life and bring up something that matters to them months later.

• An autistic adult may volunteer to help someone even if they do not express it in emotional words.

These acts show care, attention, and connection, all signs of empathy.

Why You Should Read Dropped in a Maze: My Life on the Spectrum

If you want to really understand how empathy works in autism, it helps to hear from an autistic person themselves. Sonia Chand’s book is a great place to start. She talks about her life experiences, her relationships, and the challenges she has faced because of misunderstandings like the “lack of empathy” myth.

Her book does not just talk about empathy. It addresses many common misconceptions about autism, such as:

• That autistic people do not want friends

• That they cannot understand emotions

• That they are all the same

• That autism is only about challenges and not about strengths

By reading Sonia’s story, you get an inside look at what it feels like to live with autism and how empathy is experienced from the autistic perspective. This can help you:

• Avoid making wrong assumptions

• Learn how to communicate better

• See strengths that others may overlook

• Build more genuine connections

If you are a parent, teacher, caregiver, or friend of an autistic person, reading Dropped in a Maze can help you replace myths with understanding. It is not a textbook. It is a real human story with insights you can apply in your daily life.

Get a copy of "Dropped in a Maze" on Amazon today.

How to Encourage and Recognize Empathy in Autistic People

One of the most powerful ways to break the myth that autistic people have no empathy is to actively look for it and create conditions where it can flourish.
Empathy doesn’t disappear just because it’s expressed differently. But if we only measure it by “typical” signs, we risk missing it completely.

Here’s how to see, encourage, and appreciate empathy in autistic people in ways that respect their unique communication styles and lived experiences.

Listen Without Judging

Listening is one of the simplest, yet most effective, ways to allow empathy to show. But it has to be true listening, not the kind where we’re waiting for a person to behave exactly how we expect.

Why Judgment Blocks Empathy Recognition

When we have fixed ideas about how someone should express care, like expecting immediate verbal reassurance or a hug, we can unintentionally overlook other signs of empathy.
For example:

• An autistic child might not say, “I’m sorry you’re sad,” but may hand you their favorite toy to comfort you.

• An autistic adult may not offer a hug but might quietly do something helpful, like making you a cup of tea or taking care of a task so you can rest.

If we judge these acts as “less caring” simply because they’re not typical, we send the wrong message, that their way of showing care isn’t enough.

How to Practice Non-Judgmental Listening

1. Give time for processing: Many autistic people process emotions and responses more slowly, not because they don’t care, but because they are thinking carefully about what to say or do.

2. Accept alternative expressions: Look for care in actions, problem-solving, or small thoughtful gestures, not just emotional words.

3. Avoid interrupting: Silence is not absence of empathy; sometimes it’s a moment of emotional processing.

By listening without judgment, you open the door for empathy to come through in the way that feels most natural for them.

Learn Autistic Communication Cues

Empathy is often communicated through subtle cues that are easy to miss if you’re only tuned in to “typical” social signs like tone of voice, facial expressions, or eye contact.

Common Autistic Empathy Cues

• Acts of service: Doing something helpful without being asked.

• Remembering details: Recalling something you said months ago and following up on it.

• Offering information: Sharing knowledge or resources to help solve your problem.

• Checking in over time: Consistently asking how you’re doing, even if not during the emotional moment itself.

For example, if you mentioned once that you like a certain snack, and weeks later they bring it when you’re having a rough day, that’s empathy in action. It’s thoughtful, specific, and personal.

Why Learning Their Cues Matters

When you learn to read their language of care, you realize empathy is very much present, it’s just spoken in a different dialect. By doing this, you also show respect for their communication style, which makes them more likely to share openly in the future.

Create Comfortable Environments

The environment plays a huge role in whether empathy can be expressed freely. For many autistic people, sensory input like loud noises, bright lights, or crowded spaces can overwhelm their ability to focus on emotional interaction.

Why Comfort Encourages Empathy

If someone is struggling with sensory overload, their brain is busy filtering stimuli, not ignoring feelings. Reducing those distractions can make emotional expression much easier.

Practical Ways to Create Comfort

1. Choose the right setting: Quiet, softly lit spaces can help.

2. Offer sensory tools: Weighted blankets, noise-canceling headphones, or fidget items can reduce stress.

3. Be flexible with timing: Sometimes empathy is easier to express after the sensory overwhelm has passed.

Build Mutual Understanding

Empathy is not a one-way street. Just as we want autistic people to understand our feelings, we need to put in effort to understand their perspective.

Why Mutual Understanding is Key

When both sides make an effort, it reduces the communication gap described in the double empathy problem. Misunderstandings happen less often, and genuine connection can grow.

How to Build This Understanding

• Ask, don’t assume: If you’re unsure what they’re feeling, it’s okay to gently ask instead of guessing.

• Share openly: Model the kind of clear, honest emotional communication you hope to receive.

• Value differences: Accept that their empathy might show up in a way that’s less “emotional” but equally meaningful.

When you work on understanding each other’s ways of feeling and showing care, you strengthen the trust that makes empathy more visible.

The Role of Patience and Trust

One thing to remember is that empathy, especially in cross-neurotype relationships, often requires patience. An autistic person may need:

• Time to process what happened

• Space to think about the best way to respond

• Reassurance that their way of expressing care is valid

If you create an environment of trust and patience, you’ll see more of their natural empathy over time.

Conclusion

The idea that autistic people do not have empathy is a myth that has caused far too much harm. The truth is that autistic people can have deep empathy, strong emotional connections, and genuine care for others. They may show it differently, but it is there.

If we want to create a more inclusive and understanding world, we need to challenge myths like this one. That starts with listening to autistic voices and learning from their experiences.

Sonia Chand’s Dropped in a Maze: My Life on the Spectrum is one of those voices. It offers personal insights that can help you understand autism beyond the stereotypes. If you truly want to see the human side of autism, read her book. It could change the way you see empathy forever.

Get a copy of "Dropped in a Maze" on Amazon today.